Home
>
Positive Attitude Tips
>
Use Affirmations to Build Self-Esteem

Use Affirmations to Build Self-Esteem

Most of us carry on a running internal dialogue at all times. It is as if our lives are a sporting event on television and there is a panel of psychic sports commentators hunched over their microphones doing a play-by-play of the action.

Too often, the person at the "negative commentary" microphone hogs the show! The unseen producer has the volume on that mike turned up, and the other microphones are muted or turned off entirely.

What comes through in this ongoing psychic play-by-play is often quite negative, harsh, critical -- as if someone is screaming: "You idiot! You should have known not to get in this lane. Of course it's going to be the slowest!" Or: "You always do it wrong. Everybody else knows how to do this, but YOU..."

Imagine how a real-life football game would unfold if the quarterback had these voices echoing in his head while he is on the field, calling and executing plays under intense pressure. It's safe to say his performance would be less than optimal.

The same is true for us, as we listen to negative or doubting or critical or pessimistic voices in our heads. "This speech probably won't go well." "I'm always unlucky -- good things never happen to me."

It can take tremendous focus and extraordinary expenditure of energy to function at our best when we are distracted by this chorus of silent negativity echoing within our minds.

These negative and critical voices are likely to be the loudest when one is tired, hungry, lonely, sad, sick -- or in some kind of emotional or physical pain. When one's strength or resistance is lowered, it seems the negative voices only gain in strength and intensity.

The conscious and intentional use of positive affirmations is a powerful way to counter these voices of negativity within. It is important to emphasize that what we are suggesting here is not self-hypnosis or an attempt to "psych" yourself into believing something which at the moment you don't believe.

No, the use of positive affirmations is simply to rebalance the internal dialogue, to add more positive voices to the mix. To return to our sports commentary analogy, using positive affirmations is akin to "producing your own show" -- unmuting the microphones before the commentators who are inclined to view the game in a more positive and compassionate light, thus giving these voices more air time in the internal dialogue.

In fact, as I tell my clients, it is not important that they believe the affirmations as they are speaking or reading them. The benefit occurs through simply adding positive and affirmative statements into the ongoing dialogue within. This slowly begins to shift the balance toward a more optimistic, compassionate and self-accepting way of relating to oneself.

Try an experiment. Make a list of five simple affirmative statements about yourself. Go through the list and edit out any negative, ambivalent or pessimistic language until the statements are unequivocally positive.

Examples:

"I try hard to do my best."

"I am a good and loving person."

"When I am angry or upset, I am only responding out of my hurt and my confusion."

"I am learning more each day about how to make the most of my life."

"I am loved and accepted by those who truly know me."

Read through your list four or five times a day -- for a week. Let yourself hear the words without trying to analyze them or debate about whether they are true. Don't worry if you don't feel anything immediately -- there's no magic here.

But there is a kind of magic, over time, in practicing self- compassion -- acts of kindness and generosity directed towards oneself. The world can be a hard place -- do we really need to make things more difficult for ourselves? Imagine yourself as a friend -- to yourself! Positive affirmations are a way of rebalancing the too-often negative internal dialogue, by adding in some consciously chosen words of kindness, compassion and optimism.

I dare you to try it!

David Yarian, Ph.D. is the creator of The Guide to Self-Help Books, http://www.books4selfhelp.com and co-author of Self-Help Central, an ezine to help you build a better life with self-help resources. He is a Licensed Clinical Psychologist and Certified Sex Therapist in private practice in Nashville, TN. His professional website is http://www.books4selfhelp.com

kitchen deep cleaning Deerfield ..

In The News:

Unlike robotaxi competitors, Tensor focuses on consumer-owned self-driving cars that adapt to highways and urban roads with full redundancy systems for safety.

Medicare scams cost $54 billion in 2024 as fraudsters target beneficiaries with fake calls demanding payments and personal information to steal benefits.

Scammers create fake Evite invitations that mimic legitimate event emails, requiring users to verify senders and use antivirus software for protection.

The new Apple Watch hypertension feature passively monitors blood pressure patterns over 30 days using sensors to detect chronic high blood pressure signs.

Chrome extension spyware disguised as a free VPN service highlights security risks after it captured private browsing data from trusted sites.

New research shows how fatty acids in cooking oil can safely dissolve and recover silver from circuit boards without harmful chemicals or environmental damage.

The Fox News AI newsletter gives you information on the latest AI technology advancements, and about the challenges and opportunities AI presents now and for the future.

Anthropic investigates alarming AI abuse case where hacker automated entire cybercrime campaign using Claude, stealing sensitive data from defense and healthcare firms.

TikTok, Meta and YouTube restrict Charlie Kirk shooting videos with age gates and warnings while X faces criticism for allowing continued circulation.

Cybercriminals use fake troubleshooting websites to trick Mac users into running terminal commands that install Shamos malware through ClickFix tactics.

San Francisco startup Fable launches Showrunner, an AI platform dubbed the 'Netflix of AI' that generates animated episodes from text descriptions with Amazon support.

Apple raised iPhone prices for some models despite receiving tariff relief from President Donald Trump, with the new lineup starting at $799 for the base model.

A two-story 3D concrete printed home in Western Australia demonstrates faster construction methods that could reshape American housing amid rising costs.

Credit scores remain important during retirement for insurance rates and housing applications, while seniors become prime targets for identity theft and financial scams.

Scammers now send unexpected packages with QR codes that redirect victims to fraudulent websites or download malicious software to steal sensitive information.

Meeting AI tools record private conversations alongside work discussions, creating privacy risks that can be managed with proper settings and awareness.

Hotel privacy concerns are valid but rare, with methods to detect hidden tech using smartphone flashlights, mirror tests and scanning apps.

Improve your Wi-Fi speed and reliability with 10 simple router optimization tips that don't require special apps or expensive subscriptions.

A Columbia University breach exposed names, Social Security numbers and academic records of nearly 869,000 people, with notifications beginning in August.

Rental car drivers use AI-powered apps like Proofr to protect themselves from unfair damage fees as major companies deploy automated inspection tools.

Fox News' AI newsletter brings you the latest on technology advancements around artificial intelligence.

OnTrac data breach between April 13-15, 2025, exposed personal information of over 40,000 people including Social Security numbers and medical records.

A woman named Wika announces her engagement to an AI chatbot sparking worldwide debate about virtual relationships and technology.

The notorious people search site National Public Data relaunches despite a previous breach affecting 3 billion individuals, raising fresh privacy concerns.

Revolutionary TRAUMAGEL gel controls life-threatening bleeding from gunshot wounds and traumatic injuries, helping first responders prevent prehospital deaths.

Use Affirmations to Build Self-Esteem

Positive Attitude Tips