So What Is A Limiting Belief?

So what is a limiting belief?

Don't you love the current expression: 'does what it says on the can'. The can is, of course, purely metaphorical and 'does what it says' suggests clarity and ultimate intelligibility.

A limiting belief, obviously, does exactly what it says on the can: it holds people back in any and every area of their life. Perfectly clear ? or is it?

In fact, the potential problem lies in the underlying assumption that the limiting beliefs sufferer actually believes they have any real and unique value, gifts and qualities. Often they don't. That's the nature of a limiting belief.

Women who have endured the brainwashing of an abusive relationship don't feel they are blessed with value, gifts and qualities. Understandably, they tend not to feel blessed at all. Even if they know, with their head, that they have certainly abilities; even if friends, family and colleagues corroborate this, they don't really believe it. It has no bearing on their emotional world.

"Yes, but?" they'll say; or, "it doesn't make me feel better about myself", or other words to that effect. They can't feel any pleasure in the good that others see in them, because they simply don't believe it. The only communications they can truly receive are on the frequency of the negative beliefs that they hold about themselves.

It's an agonising place to be, as well as endlessly frustrating for the people who try to support them.

Working with other women's limiting beliefs recently took me back to my first experience of coaching?

At first when the core question: "What's holding you back?" came up: I couldn't even formulate an answer.

I thought I was doing pretty well when I eventually came up with an answer and proudly offered it to my first coach: what was holding me back, I said, was me.

Awareness has to start somewhere, I guess. As I now see it, I was both right and wrong. What was holding me back was me ? inasmuch as it was not anyone else

But, equally, what was holding me back it was not me.

You see, we are not our self-limiting beliefs and our self-limiting beliefs are not who we are. Not at all. They are, at most, a distorting, fairground mirror, in which we glimpse a grotesque distortion of ourselves.

I know this with my head because I've learned it somewhere along my own (ongoing) journey. I believe it with my whole being because I see it in the women I work with.

They may experience themselves as a human black hole. Regardless of what goes into them, nothing unconditionally good will ever come out from them. Or so they believe. They feel condemned to sit forever on the sidelines, watching the great game of life without ever becoming full participants.

They are like hungry, urchins, whose nose is forever pressed against the window, They can see other people seated at the banquet of life and they know, they just know that they'll never participate in that feast.

Now, that knowledge is false. They have no way of predicting the future. Their view of their world is simply darkened by a self-limiting belief that appears to have all the trappings of reality. So they struggle, futilely, with a vision of the future that is crude, pessimistic, and false. That vision that crushes them daily.

And yet, as soon as they turn their focus away from themselves, they are perceptive, creative, supportive, nurturing, dynamic, multi-talented, energetic. Those qualities, and many more, are who they truly are.

Anyone who survives an abusive relationship has actually dug very deep and unearthed enormous personal resources and riches.

For as long as they continue to regard themselves through the filter of self-limiting beliefs they may well remain deaf, blind and numb to their own personal treasure. But their treasure will continue to grow and the day will come when they are able to claim it and rejoice in it.

How long will the process take? That depends. If you listen to your limiting beliefs, it'll make the seven labours of Hercules pale into insignificance.

But if you start to challenge them, if you start to ask yourself ? or better still, get someone else to ask you: 'Is it always that way?', 'Do you never??' , 'How do you know what the future holds? Do you have special gifts?' then you'll start to get some new answers and some new realizations.

You'll find that your limiting beliefs will start to fall by the wayside. You'll be surprised by how much faster you can move forward without them. And you'll be amazed to discover just how special and valuable you truly are.

(C) Annie Kaszina 2005

An NLP Practitioner and Women's Empowerment Coach, Annie helps women to create strong boundaries, so they can learn to build healthy, nurturing relationships where they can give and receive the love they want, safely.

Email:annie@joyfulcoaching.com To subscribe to Annie's twice monthly ezine, or order her eBook 'The Woman You Want To Be, go: to http://www.joyfulcoaching.com

no-contract cleaning service Mundelein ..
In The News:

Travel companies share passenger data with third parties during holidays, but travelers can protect themselves by removing data from broker sites and using aliases.
Xpeng's humanoid robot moves so realistically that crowds believed it was fake, marking a major advancement in robotics technology ahead of 2026 commercial launch.
Researchers discover phishing scam using invisible characters to evade email security, with protection tips including password managers and two-factor authentication.
iPhone and Android users can reduce battery drain and data usage by restricting Background App Refresh to Wi-Fi connections instead of mobile networks.
Scammers nearly stole an Apple account by exploiting the support system with authentic-looking tickets and phone calls, users can protect themselves with safety steps.
FoloToy restored sales of its AI teddy bear Kumma after a weeklong suspension following safety group findings of risky and inappropriate responses to children.
Threat intelligence firm Synthient uncovers one of the largest password exposures ever, prompting immediate security recommendations.
Viral video shared by Elon Musk shows Tesla's Optimus humanoid robots performing tasks from cooking to construction, garnering over 58.5 million views on social media.
Chinese hackers used Anthropic's Claude AI to launch autonomous cyberattacks on 30 organizations worldwide, marking a major shift in cybersecurity threats.
Apple's new Sleep Score feature gives you a rating for your nightly rest quality. Learn how to set it up on your Apple Watch and iPhone today.
Essential phone settings to enable before losing your device, including Find My network, location services and security features for iPhone and Android.
The Fox News AI Newsletter gives readers the latest AI technology advancements, covering the challenges and opportunities AI presents.
Cybersecurity research shows weak passwords remain a major threat, with simple patterns and number sequences putting millions of accounts at risk.
New Android malware BankBot YNRK silences phones, steals banking data and drains crypto wallets automatically. Learn how this advanced threat works.
FDA approves first human trial for Paradromics' brain-computer interface that could restore speech for paralyzed patients through neural technology.
New phishing platform QRR targets Microsoft 365 users across 1,000 domains in 90 countries. Learn how to spot fake login pages and protect your accounts.
OpenTable now uses AI to track your dining habits and share insights with restaurants. Learn what data they collect and how to protect your privacy.
Google's discontinued Nest thermostats still secretly upload home data to company servers despite losing smart features, raising serious privacy concerns.
New Android malware NGate steals NFC payment codes in real-time, allowing criminals to withdraw cash from ATMs without your card. Learn protection tips.
DoorDash confirms data breach exposing customer names, emails, addresses after social engineering attack. Learn how to protect yourself from scams.
Concerned about Google's AI scanning your Gmail? Learn how to disable Gemini features that access your emails, Drive files and Chat messages for privacy.
Google warns Android users about dangerous fake VPN apps hiding malware that steals passwords, banking details and personal data from phones and tablets.
Apple's digital passport feature lets iPhone users breeze through TSA checkpoints this holiday season using Digital ID technology at 250+ airports.
A new phishing scam targets family photos with fake "Cloud Storage Full" alerts. Criminals steal credit card information through fake sites. Learn protection tips.
South Korean scientists create ultra-thin fabric muscles that turn clothes into robotic assistants, lifting 33 pounds while weighing under half an ounce.

Creating an Emotional Retreat

Emotions have the tendency to take over our actions and... Read More

Transform Your Behavior Painlessly by Using the 5-Minute Success Strategy

Recently, I coached a young woman whom I'll call Mary... Read More

Life Changing Attitude

Do you really believe that there is anything in this... Read More

Optimism: The Tremendous Benefits of a Positive Attitude

How many times have you heard someone say, "Hey, cheer... Read More

3 Ways to Change Roadblocks into Valuable Tools

Our initial reaction when hitting a setback or a "roadblock,... Read More

Notable Thoughts on Positive Living

I went online -- and what do I see? A... Read More

What?!? No Bananas?

"Where are your bananas?" It seemed like a logical question... Read More

How To Live A Life Of No Problems

For most of us our lives are a problem which... Read More

Reality Exposed

Did you know that our thoughts may be influencing our... Read More

Failure is Celebration Time

Failure is my favorite subject. For I have spent my... Read More

Ditch Lack of Confidence and Unlock Full Potential

Being the next Carmen Electra or Paris Hilton might or... Read More

Self-Confidence Secrets: Measure Your Successes

Would you like to be confident in the things you... Read More

Positioned For Success - The Refined Art Of Taking A Chance

ARE YOU IN... OR OUT?Are you in or out of... Read More

Instant Frequency Boosters: 10 Fast and Simple Ways to Raise Your Vibration

When you're feeling "low," or out of the flow, it's... Read More

Moving? Pack an Emotional First Aid Kit

From Making the Big Move: how to transform relocation into... Read More

Don?t Worry, Be Happy!

Philippians 4:6-do not be anxious about anything, but in everything,... Read More

Use Affirmations to Build Self-Esteem

Most of us carry on a running internal dialogue at... Read More

Taking Yourself Too Seriously? - Suggestions for Reclaiming Your Perspective

"We can change our circumstances by a mere change of... Read More

5 Proven Ways to Safely Make Positive Life Changes

One of the most important aspects of living a healthy... Read More

Aging

Aging is a matter of the mind.The years may creep... Read More

Releasing Self Sabotage for Success and Happiness in Life

Today, I wanted to mention this notion of self-sabotage.I recently... Read More

The Rearview Mirror and the Stuff of Life

Recently, a dear friend who has been both a coach... Read More

Decide Your Own Destiny

Human nature is created so that you can choose your... Read More

Help Yourself to a Better Future

There are very many methods for achieving improvement to our... Read More

Watch Your Mouth

Ever had one of those mothers, or grandmothers, who would... Read More

maid service near Glenview ..