Do you ever find yourself thinking, "Life has taught me some tough lessons, and the scars do not heal easily."? This article can help you learn valuable lessons from the past, instead of allowing the past to determine your future.
The quality of the life we live, is based upon the learning we derive from our experiences. I know that for myself, it is sometimes easy to feel that "Life has taught me some tough lessons, and the scars do not heal easily." When I find myself thinking like this it means that I have fallen into the trap of believing that "It is 'only natural' that an 'X' type event or relationship, will lead to a 'Y' type response." At other times it becomes apparent that if I had somehow learned something different from a particular challenging situation, the quality of my life would be much more rewarding.
In working with a client struggling with alcoholism, we spent our first session with the client telling me in detail how he had come to live such an unhealthy debilitating life. In short he said: "Both my parents were alcoholics, and both of them were physically abusive to me. I grew up never knowing what bad thing would happen next. I learned from my parents that the best way to not have to feel the pain and uncertainty of life was to escape into an altered state of alcohol induced euphoria." When listening to a client tell such a sad story, it is easy to believe that their situation was all but preordained.
As fate would have it, a week after beginning to work with this client, I went to a business luncheon to hear an inspirational speaker discuss how we can live our life fully, and succeed in times of hardship. Indeed, the speaker was truly inspirational. When the talk was over I waited around to thank him.
After introducing myself and thanking him, I asked him how he had come to lead such an exemplary life. He looked around to make sure no one else was listening and in a low voice he said the following: "Both my parents were alcoholics, and both of them were physically abusive to me.I grew up never knowing what bad thing would happen next. I learned from my parents that the worst possible way to deal with the pain and uncertainty of life was to escape into an altered state of alcohol induced euphoria. My parents taught me a difficult but very important lesson. I learned from them that staying present in the moment is the only real chance we have for living a fulfilling life."
What a truly great example of embodied spirit the motivational speaker offers us. The quality of our life is not dependent on the circumstances we encounter. The quality of our life is dependent on what we learn from the circumstances we encounter. Perhaps the greatest example of this wisdom is present in the life of Nelson Mandela. He is a man that suffered great pain and hardship, and somehow his suffering seasoned his soul in a way that has led him to be compassionate and caring.
In the course of exploring how to live our life more fully we can consider pondering one question over and over again, "What can I learn from the difficulties I am experiencing, that will actually ADD to the quality of my life?" At the very least we can begin to entertain the fact that: We can derive a wide range of learning from any single circumstance, event, or relationship. When we get the most stuck in life is when we believe that the one thing we did learn is the only thing that can be learned.
About The Author
Charlie Badenhop is the originator of Seishindo, an Aikido instructor, NLP trainer, and Ericksonian Hypnotherapist. Benefit from a new self-help Practice every two weeks, by subscribing to his complimentary newsletter "Pure heart, simple mind" at http://www.seishindo.org
executive chauffeured services Bradford .. Madison to Airport carA day in your life is a brief and precious... Read More
Have you ever thought about you have a lot to... Read More
"I must not fear. Fear is the mind-killer. Fear is... Read More
Recently, a lady came to see me and she had... Read More
From experience, one of the biggest stumbling blocks for people... Read More
If you suffer from low self-esteem, it's because you don't... Read More
WE ARE ALL THINKING ALL OF THE TIME.Can you believe... Read More
Distortions are False Beliefs Programmed every Day by Self and... Read More
Once upon a time, I was a vibrant, youthful teenager...My... Read More
Apart form the Emotions and the attitude, Anger is a... Read More
"If you don't enjoy getting up and working and finishing... Read More
In 1978, Erma Bombeck wrote a book entitled "The Grass... Read More
Thinkers know better than to be racist. It's generally understood... Read More
Celebrating is a skill that adults with ADD (Attention Deficit... Read More
I was playing tennis today with one of my tennis... Read More
Spring is here at last! The season brings with it... Read More
You got up today to go to work, to come... Read More
Humans tend to categorize things by large or small, bright... Read More
Every day that I eat EnergyRich? Food, I get almost... Read More
In my work as a professional coach, I've had the... Read More
We have often missed the mark because we believe we... Read More
Your ability to forgive those who have hurt you in... Read More
Need a way to make your life a better place... Read More
There are only two emotions we can experience; love or... Read More
What's wrong with me? When I'm sick I get grumpy... Read More
O'Hare Chicago prom limo ..Drinking damages the soul; being lustful damages the vitality; greed... Read More
In the self-help and wellness industry, a mission has been... Read More
"The difference between a stumbling block and a stepping stone... Read More
No one likes rejection. And yet it happens. Here's how... Read More
During these times of uncertainty in the outside world, look... Read More
Are feelings and attitudes the same thing or different? Does... Read More
WE ARE ALL THINKING ALL OF THE TIME.Can you believe... Read More
Philippians 4:6-do not be anxious about anything, but in everything,... Read More
Question: "It's only three months. Or six months. Or a... Read More
Decades ago, I saw a metaphysical movie that wonderfully illustrates... Read More
While trying to ignore my teen daughters rap music a... Read More
Your mindset is a strong factor in achieving any type... Read More
We all have a unique way of communicating our story,... Read More
One thing in life is certain---change. Things never stay the... Read More
So how do we find meaning? The first step is... Read More
A balanced life not only leaves you feeling more fulfilled;... Read More
I Hear Voices?This is not a statement of paranormal; it... Read More
When you have a case of FABS, it may be... Read More
Living without limits. Living your life to the fullest. Living... Read More
Striving to improve our self esteem is on everybody's mind.... Read More
Knowing yourself is the foundation of self-esteem, self confidence and... Read More
What's my life all about is the question so many... Read More
From Making the Big Move: how to transform relocation into... Read More
Do you realize that what we believe about ourselves, affects... Read More
There is no such thing as failure ? only feedback... Read More
Positive Attitude Tips |