Do you ever find yourself thinking, "Life has taught me some tough lessons, and the scars do not heal easily."? This article can help you learn valuable lessons from the past, instead of allowing the past to determine your future.
The quality of the life we live, is based upon the learning we derive from our experiences. I know that for myself, it is sometimes easy to feel that "Life has taught me some tough lessons, and the scars do not heal easily." When I find myself thinking like this it means that I have fallen into the trap of believing that "It is 'only natural' that an 'X' type event or relationship, will lead to a 'Y' type response." At other times it becomes apparent that if I had somehow learned something different from a particular challenging situation, the quality of my life would be much more rewarding.
In working with a client struggling with alcoholism, we spent our first session with the client telling me in detail how he had come to live such an unhealthy debilitating life. In short he said: "Both my parents were alcoholics, and both of them were physically abusive to me. I grew up never knowing what bad thing would happen next. I learned from my parents that the best way to not have to feel the pain and uncertainty of life was to escape into an altered state of alcohol induced euphoria." When listening to a client tell such a sad story, it is easy to believe that their situation was all but preordained.
As fate would have it, a week after beginning to work with this client, I went to a business luncheon to hear an inspirational speaker discuss how we can live our life fully, and succeed in times of hardship. Indeed, the speaker was truly inspirational. When the talk was over I waited around to thank him.
After introducing myself and thanking him, I asked him how he had come to lead such an exemplary life. He looked around to make sure no one else was listening and in a low voice he said the following: "Both my parents were alcoholics, and both of them were physically abusive to me.I grew up never knowing what bad thing would happen next. I learned from my parents that the worst possible way to deal with the pain and uncertainty of life was to escape into an altered state of alcohol induced euphoria. My parents taught me a difficult but very important lesson. I learned from them that staying present in the moment is the only real chance we have for living a fulfilling life."
What a truly great example of embodied spirit the motivational speaker offers us. The quality of our life is not dependent on the circumstances we encounter. The quality of our life is dependent on what we learn from the circumstances we encounter. Perhaps the greatest example of this wisdom is present in the life of Nelson Mandela. He is a man that suffered great pain and hardship, and somehow his suffering seasoned his soul in a way that has led him to be compassionate and caring.
In the course of exploring how to live our life more fully we can consider pondering one question over and over again, "What can I learn from the difficulties I am experiencing, that will actually ADD to the quality of my life?" At the very least we can begin to entertain the fact that: We can derive a wide range of learning from any single circumstance, event, or relationship. When we get the most stuck in life is when we believe that the one thing we did learn is the only thing that can be learned.
About The Author
Charlie Badenhop is the originator of Seishindo, an Aikido instructor, NLP trainer, and Ericksonian Hypnotherapist. Benefit from a new self-help Practice every two weeks, by subscribing to his complimentary newsletter "Pure heart, simple mind" at http://www.seishindo.org
shuttle from O'Hare Orland Park .. Lockport Chicago limo O’HareIt is widely believed that just anybody has the intrinsic... Read More
I was playing tennis today with one of my tennis... Read More
You already have all the resources you need to accomplish... Read More
Do you know the problem with affirmations? You know, the... Read More
Before we are able to use the Universal Thought System... Read More
At your next staff meeting lead your team through the... Read More
Almost everyone experiences some form of worry one time or... Read More
The quality of your life is directly related to your... Read More
The late Norman Vincent Peale was a controversial preacher who... Read More
There are always explanations for why things to you or... Read More
A confidence crisis is looming with a recent study showing... Read More
In order to learn how to relieve ourselves of self-defeating... Read More
HOW YOUR OUTLOOK INFLUENCES HEALTH AND ABILITY TO CONTROL ANGERJane... Read More
Some people are full of confidence and able to meet... Read More
So, is this really where you thought you'd be? You're... Read More
Question: "It's only three months. Or six months. Or a... Read More
Kasia is a talented landscape designer who speaks several languages,... Read More
A Yale University study a few years ago revealed that... Read More
This is a technique that sounds a bit silly when... Read More
No one likes rejection. And yet it happens. Here's how... Read More
For some reason, most people find it easier to think... Read More
Imagine what your life would be like if you could... Read More
There is no such thing as failure ? only feedback... Read More
The most happy and successful people on earth have a... Read More
The other evening, I was meticulously assembling and painting one... Read More
Lincoln Town Car rentals Addison ..At your next staff meeting lead your team through the... Read More
I once heard the story of a grown bear that... Read More
Ever had one of those mothers, or grandmothers, who would... Read More
Know thyself.These words were inscribed in the vestibule of the... Read More
Millions struggle through life barely earning enough to survive. Many... Read More
Our thoughts really belong to the collective consciousness of the... Read More
Ever witnessed an incident that needed to be reported to... Read More
If you suffer with or have in the past suffered... Read More
Hospital patient undergoing surgery recounts how Hero Soul provided strength,... Read More
"It really works!" "Well, I'll be?!"BJ like so many others... Read More
Yea, I know........I hear you saying "that's easy for you... Read More
1. Smile2. Laugh3. Greet people courteously4. Be enthusiastic5. Dream. Engage... Read More
One of things that Charismatic people share is an unshakeable... Read More
One of the most powerful influences on your attitude and... Read More
I am an educator as well as a coach and... Read More
The image you hold of yourself determines your success or... Read More
Every emotion, wether we classify it as good or bad,... Read More
Q: I seem to beat myself before I ever get... Read More
Unhappy? Stressed out? Do you feel you not only want... Read More
Positive self-esteem is very important if not crucial to our... Read More
Improving this single attitude makes your days fly by. You... Read More
THOUGHTS are powerful. The power of THOUGHTS cannot be underestimated.... Read More
Before we are able to use the Universal Thought System... Read More
I don't want to say people are basically negative but?..if... Read More
Yuk!One thing, I really have a problem with is criticism.... Read More
Positive Attitude Tips |