There are always explanations for why things to you or others. Even though you might not understand why. Some of the time, when things happen that you do not wish for, you may be tempted to throw your arms in the and wish ...
But me! I just say 'Great'. You know why?
No, I am not one of the lucky few. I have learned a very life defining skill. And that is to maintain perspective. Of course you have heard about 'perspective'? Let us work on this together now, please.
Perspective is one of those influencers that are instrumental in shaping your reality. It is not the only influencer, but it does play a pretty crucial role.
You (and you alone) determine your perspective. Never mind what is happening out there. You are ultimately responsible for your outlook, because you can control your self-confidence, your self-talk, as well as your expectancies.
These three are the components of perspective. Success is much more possible when these three components are positive.
Yes, it might be raining out there and the sheriff might be knocking at your door. You might be faced with a bankruptcy and your most trusted partner might have just dumped you. But... what is important when these things happen is the climate/environment you are creating and maintaining in your head. Your glorious status might be history, but how about rewriting your future? And here's how...
Self-confidence
It is important for you to remember that your perceptions of reality changes depending on how you feel about yourself at any given moment. Got that? If you are full of confidence, you diminish the power of outside factors, and your internal reality is charged up with resourcefulness. 'What if my self-confidence is so low because of the failures I have experienced'? I hear you ask.
Focus on the fundamentals and basics. That is what you do. Make sure you master the fundamentals and basics of whatever it is that you want to do. And when you can do the fundamentals right, you have taken the first steps in increasing your self-confidence.
Step two involves making sure that you achieve small incremental victories. Little by little. From one small victory to the next 'little bit' bigger victory. It might be necessary at this stage to achieve as many 'baby victories' as possible. Until you feel more 'confident' to handle bigger situations. In NLP they call it 'small chunking'. Break down your challenge into smaller, manageable components. Achieve success in each little components. Haven't you heard how you eat an elephant?
Self-talk
What do you say to yourself and about yourself when you are under pressure? Think about a particular incident? Was what you were saying then helpful, resourceful or was it discouraging?
Watch your words, because they might have a tendency of sabotaging your efforts at building self-confidence.
Your words communicate one of two things. They either communicate images of failure and helplessness or they communicate images of success and resourcefulness. If you communicate helplessness to yourself, especially when you are under pressure, you are not doing yourself any favor. Which would you prefer while you are building your self-confidence: a rhetoric of past failures or a message of hope and resourcefulness?
You can change the tape you want to hear. You can change what you tell yourself by:
a. monitoring your self-talk
b. using positive, concrete language and
c. maintaining perspective.
Ok, the title of this discussion is 'Forget Positive Thinking'. I bet you my last penny, positive thinking does not work. Especially if you are under severe pressure.
For me what has worked is the practicality of building my self-confidence, monitoring my self-talk, and maintaining perspective.
Ke o agile uses http://inthezone.port5.com/2daedge.htm to stay current in his field and to gain a competitive edge. You can too! Any one can at http://inthezone.port5.com/2daedge.htm
post construction cleaning Deerfield ..Kasia is a talented landscape designer who speaks several languages,... Read More
In the latest and final Star Wars saga, Anakin Skywalker... Read More
Know thyself.These words were inscribed in the vestibule of the... Read More
Who are the Whiners? Whiners are the people who always... Read More
I was playing tennis today with one of my tennis... Read More
The quality of your life is directly related to your... Read More
Contrary to the popular saying "attitude is everything" attittude is... Read More
From Making the Big Move: how to transform relocation into... Read More
Have you ever noticed how many unhappy people there are... Read More
Would you like to be confident in the things you... Read More
At first glance, it would seem that positive thinking and... Read More
"I have no special talents. I am only passionately curious."... Read More
Near the end of December 2004, I received an email... Read More
Are you aware of your inner dialogue? If not, you... Read More
There are times in all of our lives where our... Read More
A Model of the dysfunctional, unconscious human psyche. A way... Read More
Every time something doesn't go quite right (rather frequently for... Read More
A day in your life is a brief and precious... Read More
When we were children, we were fearless. We would stick... Read More
Looking around at our circumstances we may see only mountains... Read More
Our thoughts really belong to the collective consciousness of the... Read More
Getting motivated is sometimes easy enough to do, at least... Read More
Your response (reaction?) to change is conditioned by your entire... Read More
In the self-help and wellness industry, a mission has been... Read More
One Friday in November, I began a journey from New... Read More
Airbnb cleaning service Bannockburn ..This is the age of the Quick Fix - the... Read More
We hear a lot these days about accepting responsibility for... Read More
Do you realize that what we believe about ourselves, affects... Read More
Today, I wanted to mention this notion of self-sabotage.I recently... Read More
Imagine the what you could achieve if:You were 100 %... Read More
You are the only one that can give confidence to... Read More
Some people are full of confidence and able to meet... Read More
Turn negative thoughts into positive ones.Negative thoughts can be very... Read More
"Those people who think they can do something and those... Read More
Words, Ignorance, and Casper The Friendly Ghost!Do your best to... Read More
It is widely believed that just anybody has the intrinsic... Read More
Question: "It's only three months. Or six months. Or a... Read More
"The difference between a stumbling block and a stepping stone... Read More
Maureen worked in an office with twenty other people, processing... Read More
One thing that is important to realize about thought: one... Read More
Thousands of dollars will be yours, just by using your... Read More
Life is an enigma...It starts without our knowledge, grows without... Read More
Why do we have such a downer on Pollyanna? After... Read More
Ever had a problem with doubts? Ever felt that nagging... Read More
When we were children, we were fearless. We would stick... Read More
Good morning I love you.This is a basic exercise, which... Read More
Lately, I've been hearing that it's not okay to have... Read More
What are you holding onto? Wanta quit?There are many things... Read More
Studies show that men and women profit most with having... Read More
We are all involved in this game called life and... Read More
Positive Attitude Tips |