When we were children, we were fearless. We would stick our hands in the fire, chew on the beetle bugs, and eat that dirt. But, over time, we learned those things that we should not do through experience and from "parental voices" --- those baseless fears passed down through the generations. Later in life, we learned that fire burns, beetle bugs are "yucky" and dirt is not nutritious. But, we also learned all of the things that our parents learned, including their fears and phobias, and integrated those lessons into our own "belief systems."
Our belief systems are the basis of our personalities and the foundations of our directions in life --- they are the rules by which we live. In essence, our fears, desires, and values define each of us. We are what we believe --- including our fears. However, consider what your current fears are that prevent you from moving forward. Realize that these fears are of things that we were taught and those things that we learned on our own --- in the past. Fear is based on past experiences and not on those things that we have not yet encountered. With that, we only fear what we've "already experienced." The "fear of the unknown" is doubt in the future based on the circumstances that we've encountered in the past.
Since we are what we believe, we can change who we are by enhancing our belief systems. To overcome your fears, you must first determine if the fear is based on something learned through experience or taught to us by parental voices. Fears that are taught or passed down to us can be more prominent than those we learn from personal experiences because we don't know why we fear such things. We can overcome fears through rational thinking if we're able to learn why such situations occurred that caused the fear. But, if we don't know the basis, we won't look further because we fear what we "might" find.
If you don't know why you have certain fears and cannot rationalize them, they need to be eliminated. Baseless fears are unreal and create a false blockage and a reason to give up, surrender, and rest in a comfort zone. Determine which fears are baseless and replace them with practical experiences. Realistic fears based on actual experiences can be rationalized and resolved. These resolutions can then be integrated into our lives to learn lessons and move forward in life.
Once we are able to define and diffuse our core fears, we can then rely on the fear of returning to our prior state or not succeeding in our life to drive us forward. You can then devise a plan of action to reach your Vision and focus on desires of success and fulfillment instead of hiding in the dark from the empty fears of our "parental voices."
About The Author
Edward B. Toupin is an author, life-strategy coach, counselor, Reiki Master, technical writer, and PhD Candidate living in Las Vegas, NV. Among other things, he authors books, articles, and screenplays on topics ranging from career success through life organization and fulfillment. Check out some of his recent print and electronic books as well as his articles covering various life-changing topics!
For more information, e-mail Edward at etoupin@toupin.com or visit his site at etoupin@toupin.com or etoupin@toupin.com!
Copyright (c) 2004 Edward B. Toupin
car service from Midway Burlington .. Lockport Chicago limo O’HareIf you suffer from low self-esteem, it's because you don't... Read More
Using an opponent's force against them is the fundamental teaching... Read More
"Where are your bananas?" It seemed like a logical question... Read More
The most dangerous thing is illusion. ~ Ralph Waldo EmersonFailure... Read More
We all need encouragement. Even the most callous, hard headed... Read More
You know, very often, the manner in which a person... Read More
If your life is difficult--if it's challenging, exasperating, and vexatious--... Read More
(The following is an actual email conversation between Newton Hightower,... Read More
Gail's StoryGail is a friend of mine and she was... Read More
Dr. Phil says each of us has a personal "truth"... Read More
During a Messenger chat session the other day, I asked... Read More
In speaking of comparison we need to be aware that... Read More
Striving to improve our self esteem is on everybody's mind.... Read More
Know your limits. Accept what you can't change and let... Read More
Do you realize how good you have it? Yes, everyone... Read More
How many times have you heard someone say, "Hey, cheer... Read More
When you look at your future in terms of your... Read More
Decades ago, I saw a metaphysical movie that wonderfully illustrates... Read More
I am an educator as well as a coach and... Read More
Thank you is such a beautiful phrase. When you say,... Read More
Most of us love to think that our problems are... Read More
As a trainer of coaches I often teach my students... Read More
Ever had one of those mothers, or grandmothers, who would... Read More
Many centuries ago there was a Greek philosopher who lived... Read More
Inevitably in life we will face disappointment from time to... Read More
Granger limo Chicago ..Dr. Phil says each of us has a personal "truth"... Read More
There is a wonderful story about the famous escape artist,... Read More
Think for a moment about all of the signals people... Read More
It took me a long time to realise the benefits... Read More
"Nothing can stop the man with the right mental attitude... Read More
Bernard always had a problem with money.He was always lacking... Read More
At some point in our careers, we may find ourselves... Read More
In view of the increasing negative events happening around the... Read More
A Yale University study a few years ago revealed that... Read More
Gail's StoryGail is a friend of mine and she was... Read More
At first glance, it would seem that positive thinking and... Read More
Did you know that the 911 equivalent in the UK... Read More
Did you ever run into that person that just nags... Read More
"For as a man thinketh in his heart, so is... Read More
Often when radical change occurs in our lives we feel... Read More
That strange, gut-wrenching feeling you have is not the sushi... Read More
Music is very powerful. The kind of music you listen... Read More
The infamous "glass ceiling" is blamed for business issues for... Read More
Fear is a double-edged sword. It can hold you back... Read More
There is an old joke about a man who is... Read More
One of the most important aspects of living a healthy... Read More
I was a young girl aged 12, when the one... Read More
Our thoughts define who we are. They can make us... Read More
If your life is difficult--if it's challenging, exasperating, and vexatious--... Read More
Almost everyone experiences some form of worry one time or... Read More
Positive Attitude Tips |