Cant Take a Compliment?

"Putting ourselves down,
is an insult to our worth."
--Helen Ksypka

Have you ever noticed how women dodge compliments as if they're bullets?

You look terrific.
Oh, please; I'm a mess.

That's a beautiful blouse.
This old thing?

You did a super job.
Not really.

What a great dinner.
It was nothing.

It was nothing. That one really gets me. Why do you think we women are taken for granted and treated as if we can and should do it all? When we prepare a meal, a party, or holiday, believe me it's a big, fat something. If someone compliments us, we need to acknowledge that we knocked ourselves out, and say: thanks for noticing.

If you think I'm blowing this out of proportion, let me tell you how resisting compliments hurt one woman's business.

I spotted a top-notch brochure and knew I'd found the graphic artist I was looking for. When I contacted her and raved about the superb layout, color choices and her eye for detail, she not only found fault with every compliment, she cited additional flaws, hellbent on convincing me that the whole brochure could have been better.

Guess what? I ran for the hills. If she didn't think she was so hot, why the heck would I hire her? And you know something? When I studied her work, again, I started to believe that maybe she wasn't so talented after all. (But on the other hand, if she had just kept her mouth shut and accepted my compliments, I would have scrutinized no further, happy to be a new client.)

Perhaps recipients of compliments think that by undermining praise, it makes them appear humble. It doesn't. Instead it sends a message that screams:

I'm not worthy.
I feel ill at ease.
I have no confidence.

And what about the people doling out the compliments? They feel they're going out of their way to show recognition, so even if the recipient rebuffs out of insecurity, it leaves the compliment-giver feeling unappreciated, frustrated, or duped that his or her observation wasn't very astute.

Now think about this for a minute. There's a steady supply of people who seize any opportunity to point out our weaknesses and shortcomings. They stomp on our ideas, dismiss our efforts, and diminish our dreams. So when compliments are handed to us on silver platters, why, oh why would we pass up positive reinforcement?

Because it's an insidious habit, but it's a habit that can be consciously reversed with practice.

If we don't think we look so great today, but someone thinks we do, why knock it? If someone thinks we did an outstanding job, let's bask in the glory. We need to ditch the attitude: "I'm not perfect enough" and give credit to ourselves and to the people who acknowledge us and our efforts. We all deserve compliments. And we deserve to take them.

About The Author

Helen Ksypka is a communication, organizational, and time management consultant. She is the founder of Communication Clout (SM/TM), a division of Born Organized (R), and offers many free tips at her website: http://www.bornorganized.com

Helen is also the author of "Quotes to the Rescue: Wisdom to Help You Live Life Effectively". For details, visit http://www.bornorganized.com

http://www.bornorganized.com

Wood Dale Chicago prom limo .. Lockport Chicago limo O’Hare

In The News:

Fueled by artificial intelligence, CyberDog the robotic dog is designed specifically locate fire ant nests, which are endangering ecosystems.

Stay up to date on the latest AI technology advancements and learn about the challenges and opportunities AI presents

Internet browsers are useful, but they can be dangerous. Clicking on malicious links can direct you to dangerous websites that steal information or infect your device.

Apple's latest iOS update introduces advanced artificial intelligence capabilities, which may be capturing and analyzing sensitive information.

Breach site confirmed 56,904,909 Hot Topic users' data leaked online. Tech expert Kurt “CyberGuy" Knutsson says the company's silence makes matters even worse.

Tech expert Kurt “CyberGuy" Knutsson discusses how an innovative Easy-Way kit turns standard strollers electric, simplifying navigation for parents.

Tech expert Kurt “CyberGuy" Knutsson talks about T-Mobile being hacked in broad cyberattack on global phone and internet companies.

Tech expert Kurt “CyberGuy" Knutsson shows you how to add, customize and manage widgets for quick access to apps and info from your iPhone home screen.

Wrong Google searches can not only compromise your device and personal data. They can also bring law enforcement to your doorstep. Hackers are targeting Google searches.

China's Shanghai Kepler Robotics has developed a new humanoid robot that can carry up to 35 pounds per hand for commercial applications across various industries

Checking your hearing has gotten easier with the new hearing test feature in AirPods Pro 2. You can take reliable hearing tests using your iPhone or iPad.

Stay up to date on the latest AI technology advancements and learn about the challenges and opportunities AI presents now and for the future.

Kurt "CyberGuy" Knutsson explains how a VPN — virtual private network — works and how running it can slow down the operation of your device.

The WalkON Suit F1, an exoskeleton developed to help people with disabilities, can actually walk over to a person in a wheelchair, solving a major problem.

ClickFix, a new scam targeting computer users, is on the rise in the U.S. The scam prompts its targets to click on a link to fix a problem.

Skydweller is the world's largest unmanned solar-powered aircraft that can stay airborne for weeks, and even months, without refueling.

The U.S. government said it is investigating after People's Republic of China hackers targeted commercial telecommunications service providers in the U.S.

Stay up to date on the latest AI technology advancements and learn about the challenges and opportunities AI presents now and for the future.

Scammers are using increasingly sophisticated ways to lure unsuspecting victims, and some are impersonating an email help desk or support team.

You can unsend or edit your iMessages with the latest iOS updates. Kurt the CyberGuy explains how you can save yourself some potential embarrassment.

Kurt “CyberGuy" Knutsson says there’s been a rise in cybercriminal services using hacked police and government emails to send subpoenas and data requests to U.S. companies.

Kurt “CyberGuy" Knutsson discusses how Axiom Space and luxury designer Prada are collaborating on NASA's Artemis III spacesuit design.

Voice assistants may cause confusion across devices. Tech expert Kurt “CyberGuy" Knutsson offers some solutions to fix it.

Shameless scammers trick veterans into giving personal info or cash. Tech expert Kurt “CyberGuy" Knutsson explores five common scams.

Cant Take a Compliment?

Positive Attitude Tips