HOW YOUR OUTLOOK INFLUENCES HEALTH AND ABILITY TO CONTROL ANGER
Jane and Anthony have differing ways of viewing the world. Jane is a pessimist (the glass is half-empty), while Anthony is an optimist (the glass is half-full). These outlooks influence how they experience similar situations.
SCENARIO 1: JOB LOSS
Jane is devastated, convincing herself that she is all washed up, she can never catch a break, it is useless for to try to be successful, and she is never going to succeed at anything.
Anthony, however, has a healthier inner dialog. He tells himself he may not have been good at that particular job, his skills and company's needs did not mesh, and being fired was only a temporary setback in his career.
SCENARIO 2: NEW JOBS
Offered a new job, Jane, the pessimist, believes she was able to find a new job only because her industry is now really desperate for people, and must have lowered their standards to hire her.
Anthony, however, feels he landed the new job because his talents were finally recognized and he can now be appreciated for what he can do.
IMPLICATIONS
As these examples illustrate, optimists tend to interpret their troubles as transient, controllable and specific to situations. Recent research by Dr. Marvin Seligman confirms this. When good things happen, optimists believe the causes are permanent, resulting from traits and abilities.
Optimists further believe that good events will enhance everything they do.
Pessimists, on the other hand, believe their troubles will last forever, will undermine everything they do, and are basically beyond their control. When good things happen to pessimists, they see them as temporary and caused by specific factors that will eventually change and lead to negative outcomes.
BENEFITS OF OPTIMISM
Optimism creates better resistance to depression when bad events strike, better performance at work, and better physical health.
In fact, one long term study at the Mayo clinic in Rochester, MN, found that optimists lived 19% longer than pessimists.
Optimism is also a powerful antidote to anger. Many participants in our anger management classes report their anger lessening as they learn to replace negative thinking with positive thinking.
GOOD NEWS FOR NEGATIVE THINKERS
You can learn how to replace pessimism with optimism.
The starting point is to access your vulnerability to pessimistic thinking by taking the self evaluation test you can find at http://www.authentichappiness.org
Your responses will be compared to thousands of other people in various categories, down to your Zip Code.
If you scored lower than you'd like, you can become more optimistic. As Dr. Seligman writes in Authentic Happiness his latest book: "the trait of optimism is changeable and learnable."
LEARNING TO BE AN OPTIMIST
There is now a well-documented method for building optimism. It's based on first, recognizing, and then disputing, pessimistic thoughts.
People often do not pay attention to their thoughts and thus do not recognize how destructive they can be in leading to negative emotions.
The key is to recognize your pessimistic thoughts and then treat them as if they were uttered by someone else-an external person, a rival, whose mission in life is to make you miserable!
Basically, you can become an optimist by learning to disagree with yourself- challenging your pessimistic thinking patterns and replacing them with more positive patterns.
Note: this view of optimistic thinking is not the process of "positive thinking" in the sense of repeating silly affirmations that you really don't believe.
Rather, it is the process of correcting distorted or faulty thinking patterns that create health, career, and relationship problems for you.
By teaching yourself to think about things differently, (but just as realistically), you can morph yourself from a pessimist to an optimist-and tame the Anger Bee in the process.
About The Author
Dr. Tony Fiore is a licensed psychologist and anger management facilitator and trainer. He also publishes a free monthly newsletter "Taming the Anger Bee". Subscribe at http://www.authentichappiness.org
http://www.authentichappiness.org
limo prices to midway Crystal Lake west of Randal .. Lockport Chicago limo O’HareIf we are the products of our attitudes then it... Read More
I Hear Voices?This is not a statement of paranormal; it... Read More
When you change your thoughts, you change your life. The... Read More
Have you truly tried and still failed? Have you pushed... Read More
What does it take to succeed? How can you move... Read More
An Attitude of Gratitude. How important is this to you... Read More
Problems, disappointments and trouble; the three skunks that sometimes think... Read More
It sounds a little masochistic, but I actually appreciate being... Read More
Do you ever find yourself thinking, "Life has taught me... Read More
Our thoughts define who we are. They can make us... Read More
This is the age of the Quick Fix - the... Read More
"Adventure isn't hanging on a rope off the side... Read More
In the self-help and wellness industry, a mission has been... Read More
As if choreographed and rehearsed the night before, one lays... Read More
Look at this glass on the table in front of... Read More
A Yale University study a few years ago revealed that... Read More
Recently, I coached a young woman whom I'll call Mary... Read More
From Making the Big Move: how to transform relocation into... Read More
Most of us carry on a running internal dialogue at... Read More
A balanced life not only leaves you feeling more fulfilled;... Read More
There is a wonderful story about the famous escape artist,... Read More
In talking with a coaching client recently, she made a... Read More
The only constant is change. If theres one thing we... Read More
As a trainer of coaches I often teach my students... Read More
They're out there? they look like people you know, but... Read More
taxi o'hare Auburn ..The way we use language can have a huge impact... Read More
Many of us allow our fear to stop us in... Read More
Uncle Liam was very kind to me again. He gave... Read More
Never Quitting Equals Success Most people who achieve fortunes in... Read More
Getting motivated is sometimes easy enough to do, at least... Read More
It started out as a windy, rainy day. A tropical... Read More
I woke up this morning feeling sour.No. That's an understatement.... Read More
Ever had one of those mothers, or grandmothers, who would... Read More
How you feel about yourself truly does affect your interaction... Read More
Each of us has a mind by which we convert... Read More
Have you ever dreaded an upcoming presentation, meeting or function... Read More
Are you an optimist or a pessimist? Is the glass... Read More
Human nature is created so that you can choose your... Read More
James Allen, who wrote the masterpiece, As a Man Thinketh,... Read More
Have you heard of the FABS? The FABS are quadruplets;... Read More
Look at this glass on the table in front of... Read More
In many ways the Star War movies are simply a... Read More
There are only two emotions we can experience; love or... Read More
The one thing that is absolutely vital to overcoming shyness... Read More
"If you don't like something, change it. If you can't... Read More
Have you ever known someone like this? "A person who... Read More
There is a growing volume of research that shows' staying... Read More
Do you know the problem with affirmations? You know, the... Read More
Who are you?We all know that we are composed of... Read More
Being the next Carmen Electra or Paris Hilton might or... Read More
Positive Attitude Tips |