I could nearly fund my children's future education if I received money every time I've heard a woman say, "I wish I could afford to stay at home full time." Sometimes you can recognize a few working women making this statement to avoid judgment from the stay-at-home parenting world (and they shouldn't feel this way). However, a majority of these women truly prefer to be at home, and are spending days trapped in a work "cell" and feeling committed for life.
First and foremost, I would like to stress that I am not going to join the pros or cons of either side of this debate. I have been both a working mother and a stay-at-home mother. I think they both have their advantages and disadvantages. I have equally loved and loathed both on any given day!
When I was working in sales and marketing, I loved the ability to meet new people, to negotiate, to close deals, to be given a task, a goal, a deadline, and to be able to start and finish a project. The hardest transition to full time "mommy" world for me is that no task or project ever seems complete. I make the meal and it's quickly eaten. I make and clean up after another meal, and another meal only to be greeted by requests for many impromptu snacks. I do the laundry, and it's worn, becomes dirty and needs to be done again. I wash the dishes, the floor, clean the house, and within a matter of hours my hard work is all undone. This applies to the bigger projects as well, like reorganizing cupboards, closets, and drawers, although at least this usually buys me a few days of pride and satisfaction, rather than just a few hours.
However, even though my tasks may never seem accomplished, my house never as clean as I feel it is suppose to be, there are days when I am playing with my children, laughing, hugging, holding them and I think I would have missed moment. Everyday they grow and change and it becomes harder to remember what they were like the month prior, nonetheless a year prior. For this I am thankful for an opportunity to have these special "mommy" moments.
I think that we as women have such strong bonds and influence on each other in friendships and in family relationships. We need to use that influence and stop debating each other over who is right and who is wrong in the stay-at-home or work debate and just accept that we each have our own "right".
For women who desperately yearn to be home with their children, we need to fight for employers and businesses to create better work at home opportunities so that if money is an issue, and a dual income is necessary, it doesn't have to be at the cost of our desired family life. After carrying a child inside of us for nine months and giving birth, we have earned the right to spend every waking moment with him or her is we so desire.
For women who truly enjoy and thrive in a work atmosphere, I say then don't feel guilty. I am taking pleasure in a hiatus right now, but I sincerely enjoyed working as well. Women have labored a long, hard time to pave the way for the success were seeing in today's culture and you needn't give that up to become a mother if working makes you happy. The popular saying that relates to families "if Mom is happy, we're all happy" couldn't be more true!
I will emphasize that as a working Mother or parent, you do need to set boundaries with your employer, and let them know that your family is as important as your career. When I was working, I fought for and demanded a part-time flexible schedule that worked for my family.
Except for the occasional project, I made it a priority to leave the office on time everyday, making it understood by my boss and coworkers that this was my schedule and I would not impress anyone with late night office departures.
Coincidently, in every office I have worked in, it is often those who consistently spent most of their day accomplishing very little, that ended up burning the "midnight" oil. I spent my days working smart and efficiently, and felt no guilt at my "on time" departure routine. So don't feel pressured to stay late, because it looks good in the eyes of your coworkers. My bosses always knew how hard I worked, and none of them blinked an eye when I left for the day.
So ladies, instead of debating each other, let's use our influence, our power, our minds, and our hearts, to help each other do what is right for one another; even if our "right" may be different from someone else's. We all need to work together in order to continue to make a difference. Together, we can make certain that work choices, family flexible schedules, and genuine work from home opportunities are available to us so we can support our families both financially and emotionally.
We may not always agree when it comes to various parenting issues, but I am certain as parents we can unanimously agree that we all love our children.
Tina Frazer is the Founder of Let's Be Friends.net, a friendship website for women. let's be friends.net promotes and encourages new friendships among women of all ages* and stages of life who share similar interests, lifestyles, and values. Our mission at Let's Be Friends.net is to reintroduce friendship as a priority in women's lives. For more information about Let's Be Friends.net visit let's be friends.net
*Members must be at least 18 years old.
executive chauffeured services Bradford .. Madison to Airport carBeyond cases reported to authorities, little knowledge exists on the... Read More
You want your daughter to wear a dress to the... Read More
If your parenting methods include abuse of any kind; physical,... Read More
The snow was getting heavier with each lift of the... Read More
All babies cry, but if yours cries a lot, isn't... Read More
Mother's Day is important for children.This Mother's Day take note... Read More
Do you really want your child to enjoy playing with... Read More
Creating and making special memories with your child is very... Read More
It is extraordinary times that we find ourselves in. Change... Read More
By not planning for the future we guarantee that we... Read More
We all want to comfort our children after they suffer... Read More
Despite serious reductions in funding for arts programs in... Read More
What's new and effective in the treatment of Attention problems?... Read More
Minus all meningitis thoughts. The flu symptons were strong. Headache,... Read More
Are you looking for the Ultimate Airplane Themed Party Games... Read More
In an actual war, to be attacked means to have... Read More
Compulsory attendance laws are school authorities' first assault on parental... Read More
For troubled teens who are struggling with drug abuse, depression... Read More
In the last few years, parents started getting more and... Read More
The legend and myth of the Tooth Fairy is a... Read More
Children and teenagers are relentlessly bombarded with merchandise that entices.... Read More
Do you have a young child whose weight or eating... Read More
Oh yes you have! Suddenly, "Where's Bobby?" You instantly realize... Read More
Being in a competitive world, the lowest qualification to secure... Read More
Nothing touches the heartstrings of a parent more than the... Read More
O'Hare Chicago prom limo ..When growing up, my father frequently reminded me to "pay... Read More
Is your baby approaching his or her first birthday and... Read More
Do you have a young child whose weight or eating... Read More
How can two or three children in the same family... Read More
You're trying to catch up on some sleep on a... Read More
Who lives in your house? Are they driving you "crazy?"... Read More
Speaking as a Michael (a Hebrew name, meaning "Who is... Read More
Q. I need your help with a question about my... Read More
As a mother of two sets of fraternal boy/girl twins,... Read More
Part of the responsibility of being a father is to... Read More
Mother's Day is important for children.This Mother's Day take note... Read More
Because most teens have not had the experience of getting... Read More
Many research studies have shown the overall effectiveness of stimulant... Read More
Many of us have grown up drinking caffeinated diet sodas... Read More
Many children enjoy TV, and they can learn from it.... Read More
Dear MomOn this day set aside to honour "Mother's" let... Read More
In June, elementary school children across North America cheered as... Read More
Parents want their children to succeed in school. However, sometimes... Read More
I will cherish this moment. I will not let it... Read More
There are two methods for teaching children to read; whole... Read More
All of us, including your child, entered this world equipped... Read More
Look around: Your kids are counting sleeps until the last... Read More
Dear Sir, It was with some interest that I read... Read More
To protect children's self-esteem or deflect complaints by parents, many... Read More
? Let the child choose his or her own lunch... Read More
Parenting |