Home
>
Parenting
>
The Secret, Unconscious Game Children and Parents Play Where No One Wins!

The Secret, Unconscious Game Children and Parents Play Where No One Wins!

Did you know there's a game children and parents play all the time and yet, neither of them knows about it? This article discusses this unconscious, no-win game children play with their unknowing parents; how points get scored; why the game isn't a good thing to play, and how parents can stop the game.

I wish I could tell you the name of the game. It's a secret and has no name. Parents and children don't even know they're playing the game. The purpose of the game is simple; children play it to get their way. The game itself is based on a point system. Whoever has the most points has the most power and control in the parent-child relationship. The minute a child asks the parent for something and is met with the answer, "no," the game begins!

Children score points when they argue with their parents so much, their parents become upset, raise their voice and lose their 'cool.' Or when they are asked to do something and then don't do it correctly and they're not caught, they win a point. When children say they did their chores or completed their homework and didn't and their parents don't check up on them to see if they're being honest, another point gets scored. Another ay to score a point happens when parents tell their children tothey will do something for them and then don't follow through. If you tell your child you'll take him to the store on Wednesday and then weasel out of it, you just gave your child a point. Why? Because you're teaching your child it's okay not to be a person of your word.

Parents score points when they do not argue with their children. Imagine you have a bonfire on the beach. If you stop putting fire on, what happens? You guessed it! It eventually goes out. When they remain calm, regardless of a child's reactions,they get the point. Yes, I realize this is not always an easy thing to do.

Any time a parent follows through with a promise, another point is scored. If you say you'll drive your child to the store, do it. Don't make any promises unless you feel certain you can carry them through for the child. When you tell or ask your child to stop doing something and he doesn't, follow through until he does. This might mean you have to quietly and calmly walk over and physically help him. You could say something like, "Thanks for letting me know you need help doing this. I love you so much I want to make sure you can do this." If you say it sarcastically, the child gets the point because you won't sound sincere.

The downside of this game is that no one ever wins. When parents play, they give away their parental power and control to their children. Each time parents react with anger and frustration, they non-verbally let their children know the children are stronger than the parent. If a child gets the unconscious message he or she is stronger, that child won't feel safe. "Who's going to take care of me and keep me safe if I'm emotionally stronger than my parent?" What you may see is a child acting out even more, testing the parent to set limits and stop the child's behavior.

When children play the game over time, they do not learn to accept the word "no." This is crucial if they are to grow up as respectful, responsible adults.

Now that you know about this no-win game, how can you, as a parent, stop it? Stay calm, no matter what's happening. If you want some ideas on how to do this, you can find some ideas on my blog called, "How to Act Like a Super nanny at Home." The address is http://www.parentsurvival.org. By staying calm, not arguing, walking away; the game loses its strength because the parent is in control. You haven't put any logs on the fire.

If you tell your child to do something, make sure you check to see that it's done according to your desires. If your child starts to argue, simply say, "I love you too much to argue" and walk away. If you answer your child's comments, you will lose the point. The trick here involves being quiet, the less said, the better.

Children may not get what they think they want when their parents no longer play with game with them. However, they get what they need, which are strong successful parents who love them enough to stop playing the game. Only then will everyone win.

MaryLynne White
Can a Game Really Compel Any Child to Behave?
"How to Become a Super Nanny in Your Own Home!
Free Consumer Awareness Guide Shows You How..."
http://www.parentsurvival911.com

elite cleaning services Mundelein ..

In The News:

Scammers are flooding inboxes with fake tracking alerts that mimic real carriers, exploiting the holiday rush to steal logins and personal data.

The Fox News AI Newsletter brings you the latest news on AI technology advancements and the challenges and opportunities AI presents now and for the future.

Texas family reunites with missing 11-year-old cat Grayson after 103 days using Petco Love Lost's AI photo matching technology and community help.

Tired of AI customer service loops? These insider tricks help you escape "frustration AI" and get real human help when you need it most for urgent issues.

Unlock richer audio from your streaming apps with simple tweaks to volume normalization, equalizer settings, and quality preferences for cleaner sound.

Scammers are sending fake Facebook settlement payout emails that mimic legitimate notices from the privacy settlement administrator to deceive users.

Holiday shopping scams surge as fake refund emails target distracted consumers during Black Friday and holiday seasons, costing Americans billions annually.

The AI-powered IRMO M1 exoskeleton features four modes, including turbo, eco, training and rest for hiking, running, cycling and sports with eight-hour battery life.

OpenAI announced upgrades for its ChatGPT Images platform on Tuesday, saying the program can now make more precise edits and produce images more quickly.

Chrome for Android now turns web articles into AI-powered podcast conversations. Get hands-free browsing with Google Gemini's natural audio summaries.

LastPass faces $1.6 million fine from U.K. regulators after 2022 data breach exposed 1.6 million users. Password manager failed proper security controls.

Petco disclosed a data breach exposing customer Social Security numbers, financial account details, and driver's license information due to a software error.

Baseball teams can now analyze complete swing mechanics in normal training environments using Theia's markerless AI system that processes standard high-speed footage.

Smart home hacking fears overblown? Expert reveals real cybersecurity risks and simple protection tips to keep your connected devices safe from hackers.

MIT develops needle-free glucose monitor using light technology. Revolutionary device could replace painful finger pricks for diabetes management.

The ClickFix campaign disguises malware as legitimate Windows updates, using steganography to hide shellcode in PNG files and bypass security detection systems.

Researchers from Osaka Metropolitan University designed a 21-foot dome that combines aquaculture and hydroponics to create a self-sustaining urban food system.

The Fox News AI Newsletter gives readers the latest AI technology advancements, covering the challenges and opportunities AI presents.

ChatGPT data breach exposes personal info of users through partner Mixpanel. OpenAI confirms names, emails compromised in security incident.

Android rolls out Emergency Live Video for 911 calls, letting dispatchers see real-time scenes during emergencies. Great for holiday travel safety.

Malicious Chrome and Edge extensions collected browsing history, keystrokes and personal data from millions of users before Google and Microsoft removed them.

Google's new Call Reason feature lets Android users mark calls as urgent before dialing, displaying an urgent label to recipients using Phone by Google app.

Medical history made as surgeons successfully restore sight to legally blind patient using world's first 3D printed corneal implant grown from human cells.

Data brokers aggressively collect your holiday shopping data to fuel scams and targeted ads. Learn how to delete your digital profile before 2025 starts.

Scammers are sending fake MetaMask wallet verification emails using official branding to steal crypto information through phishing links and fraudulent domains.

The Secret, Unconscious Game Children and Parents Play Where No One Wins!

Parenting