Each child carries a unique picture of the self, shaped in part by the influence of parents. Your child is not born with a self-image or self-assurance. Both traits are learned through experiences beginning from birth.
But who is the self-assured child? Simply put, it is the child who is confident of their self-worth, and their talents and abilities. A confident and outgoing child, who is not afraid to show the world all the unique ways in which he / she shines.
The process of making a self-assured child begins at birth. Children are born with clean slates and do not implicitly know and understand their self-worth. The seeds of self-assurance and self-esteem, therefore, must be carefully sown by the adult figures in a child's life.
Let's take a look at 3 ? year old Jennifer:
Jennifer attends pre-school. As part of the year-end wrap up, Mom and Dad meet with Jen's pre-school teacher, Mrs. Hamilton.
Mrs. Hamilton tells Jen's parents that she has noted that Jennifer is always seeking feedback on her accomplishments. "When Jennifer finishes a drawing," notes Mrs. Hamilton, "she is undoubtedly never sure if it is good, and, therefore, fails to exhibit any happiness. Instead, she asks her teachers for re-assurance that the drawing is beautiful and has made them happy."
Jennifer's parents have noted similar behavior at home and during play dates with other children. "Jennifer has tremendous difficulty making selections from colors of crayons to food," states Jennifer's mother. "If I ask her what she'd like for dinner, she always asks 'What are my choices?' and I begin to narrow the selections for her. Sometimes, I even make the decision for her. No matter what I choose ? even if it's her favorite meal ? Jennifer's never happy and always demands to know why she has to eat that." Mrs. Hamilton tells Jennifer's parents that she too has noted that Jennifer will talk back to a teacher or adult in charge, demanding an explanation for having to follow direction. "No matter how many times we try to talk to her," notes Jennifer's father, "she doesn't seem to have an awareness of her behaviors."
The following suggestions may help you raise self-assured children:
? Praise your child: Applause the effort, not just the outcome. Start early and give genuine compliments freely and honestly.
? Observe your child's schoolwork and other activities: Offer your child constructive feedback on their work, this will allow your child to have a safe and realistic view of themselves
? Frame social interactions: Give your child the boundaries with which to speak and respond appropriately to others
? Outline choices: Allow your child to choose from a limited amount of choices. Providing too many will overwhelm the child and may cause frustration and confusion
? Lead: Always keep a watchful eye and take charge when necessary
Keep In Mind: The process of building self-esteem needs to begin at birth but it's never too late to implement positive behaviors.
The recipe for success in raising a self-assured child is simple; connect with your child through positive interactions and communications, and offer unconditional love and support.
You will forever have an impact upon the manner in which your child interacts and feels about themselves. Reach for assistance from a professional if you have any questions.
Dr. Charles Sophy currently serves as Medical Director for the Los Angeles County Department of Children and Family Services (DCFS), which is responsible for the health, safety and welfare of nearly 40,000 foster children. He also has a private psychiatry practice in Beverly Hills, California. Dr. Sophy has lectured extensively and is an Associate Clinical Professor of Psychiatry at the University of California Los Angeles Neuro-Psychiatric Institute. His lectures and teachings are consistently ranked as among the best by those in attendance.
Dr. Charles Sophy, author of the "Keep 'Em Off My Couch" blog, provides real simple answers for solving life's biggest problems. He specializes in improving the mental health of children. To contact Dr. Sophy, visit his blog at http://drsophy.com
limo prices to midway Crystal Lake west of Randal .. Lockport Chicago limo O’HareDo any other reality TV junkies remember a show on... Read More
I am writing this from the beautiful mountains of Western... Read More
John was a 43 year-old sales manager at a large... Read More
When a couple steps forth with a baby in tow... Read More
Demanding children ? children who have entitlement issues ? seem... Read More
The cruel callous remarks made by our offspring can sometimes... Read More
Life is full of competition -- even in childhood. Kids... Read More
"How many times do I have to tell you to... Read More
"Money is tight, and my husband's obsessed with doing everything... Read More
In speaking with parents a comment I frequently hear is... Read More
Get into their world. The world that teens are growing... Read More
ADHD comes in differenty forms, or types. What... Read More
Age 1: Invite only family members and close friends only... Read More
John Bishop's Goal Setting for Students.comLegacy to Your ChildrenIt's 6:30... Read More
As our children grow, they will be going to schools... Read More
Mary, Mary, quite contrary, How does your garden grow? With... Read More
Not too long ago my teenage daughter approached me with... Read More
Your Virgo Baby..August 23 - September 22Virgo children are honest... Read More
I will never forget the day that my daughter's sixth... Read More
When a parent is deployed with the military it can... Read More
If you are currently homeschooling or considering homeschooling your child,... Read More
Some years ago when touring the Scottish Highlands, a man... Read More
Many times, we are so conditioned in how we speak... Read More
From the book Spider's Night on the BoomI've only begun... Read More
To have reasonable expectations of our children is an important... Read More
taxi o'hare Auburn ..We all want to comfort our children after they suffer... Read More
It's back to school time again. Does the thought of... Read More
A common problem many times facing parents is Colic. Estimates... Read More
The Theme from MASHI flipped the button on the remote... Read More
I recently heard a story that has literally changed the... Read More
The great thing about children is they absorb knowledge like... Read More
What parent hasn't gone into a son's or daughter's room... Read More
As a parent there are lots of things that you... Read More
As the father of a toddler, I am an expert... Read More
Software for parental control is a useful tool, if applied... Read More
Be sure to respect the intellectual changes that mark adolescence.... Read More
Have you ever experienced one of those days when you... Read More
1. They can make mistakes under your guidance2. They will... Read More
It's no surprise that the self-image and self-esteem of overweight... Read More
Certainly we all want our children to excel. But it... Read More
'Whose room is it anyway?'If you have a teenager, you're... Read More
Moms and dads, are there times you think that parenting... Read More
One of the biggest milestones in our children's education is... Read More
So you're pregnant. Congratulations! Your life is about to change... Read More
Despite serious reductions in funding for arts programs in... Read More
Dear Camille,As I thumb through the photographs that I carry... Read More
Very often, new parents rely on a parenting tip or... Read More
Have you ever sat and watch a child struggle with... Read More
Being consistent when children are less than perfect can make... Read More
More and more parents are expressing their concerns about how... Read More
Parenting |