One of the most prevalent problems of the computer age is isolation and loneliness. In order to build and maintain relationships there are a number of simple skills, which can be learned, to enhance the opportunity to find and keep friends.
All likeable people behave in certain ways. They literally have a "magnetic" personality drawing others to them. The advantages of being likeable are numerous, including higher grades and income, self-esteem, better health, longer life and happiness and well-being. Here are the five tricks you or your child can do today to increase likeability.
1. Be helpful. Studies show that "helpfulness correlates more strongly than any other attribute" with being well liked, says Haara Estroff Marno, author of Why Doesn't Anyone Like Me? Be aware of opportunities to help on a big scale, such as volunteering for projects and assisting others. Give service and teach your child to look for small ways to help others on a daily basis.
2. Liking who you are. When people feel good about themselves, they are more content and less likely to personalize every situation and comment. Develop a skill or hobby that makes you feel good and that brings joy, you don't have to be perfect at it. Just enjoying an activity and doing reasonably well will boost anyone's self-esteem. Make it a habit to end every night on a positive. Either in a journal or verbally list five things you are grateful for or that you have succeeded at in the day. Develop an attitude of gratitude.
Focus on the positive and celebrate and acknowledge your successes.
3. Say hello first. Friendly people put others at ease. Many people are hesitant to say hello because they fear rejection. But think about it, have you ever gotten mad at someone who says hello to you? Even if people don't return the greeting, they may just be pre-occupied. There is an unofficial rule about customer service that can apply to life as well; smile if someone comes within 10 feet of you, greet with a word or nod anyone within 3 feet of you. Smile with your mouth and your eyes. People who smile are perceived as friendly and approachable. A smile says, "I like you. You make me happy. I am glad to see you." To someone who has seen a dozen people frown, scowl or turn their faces away, your smile is like the sun breaking through the clouds.
4. Be aware of the message your appearance says about you. Whether we like it or not, people are judged by they way they look and act. If they look enough like everyone else, they will be more acceptable. If they stick out, they risk not fitting in. Those who develop their own unique style of dress must have the moxie and confidence to carry it off. Then it is an attribute. Your appearance, table manners, tone of voice and respect of space sends an instant message before you have a chance to explain who you are and to build a relationship.
5. Recognize the power of body language. Verbal language is the language of information and is only recognized and remembered 20%. Non-verbal or body language is the language of relationships and is acknowledged and remembered 80%. If your body is not responding according to your message, no one will hear or believe what you say. Practice and role-play so that your facial expressions, posture and hand movements are in accordance with the message you want to share with others.
We like someone because, we love someone although. So give people a number of reasons to like you.
? 2004 Judy H. Wright, Personal Historian, Parent Educator and Author - www.artichokepress.com
This handout has been prepared by Judy H. Wright, Missoula, MT parent educator and author. You may have permission to make copies for other parents and teachers but the entire article, including the signature line, must be included. A complete list of parenting books, aids, workshops and a FREE ezine is available at www.artichokepress.com. To contact us, please write judywright@artichokepress.com or call 406-549-9813.
weekly home cleaning Highland Park .."I wipe my baby's chin with my college diploma and... Read More
Sometime the most effective training tool in rapidly accelerating the... Read More
Teachers know that children thrive in an environment with routines,... Read More
Did you know there's a game children and parents play... Read More
Isn't it ironic that a country whose constitution allows for... Read More
Most of us recognize the continuing escalation of violence around... Read More
Do you want to create a deeper, more loving relationship... Read More
Ok. So you're a dad to be. If you're like... Read More
Strollers offer a wonderful and convenient service to parents and... Read More
Children explore the world around them and learn through pretend... Read More
Handing Down Malignancy.Children may begin bright and eager to face... Read More
The school holidays are a great time for the kids,... Read More
If you are a parent, then more than likely you... Read More
Detox To Conceive.. If you're having trouble conceiving... Read More
The 'phone conversation had nothing at all to do with... Read More
I had just completed a session with 17-year old Julie... Read More
Most of the ADHD kids that are seen in a... Read More
The successful preschool idea behind many successful preschool learning centers... Read More
The big yellow school bus is coming down my road... Read More
Quite simply, an absolute nightmare for parents and babies alike,... Read More
Sometimes a change of perspective can make a huge difference... Read More
Think back to your own childhood. Chances are, some of... Read More
Several similar terms describe the central attribute of a character... Read More
One of the most difficult struggles in life for a... Read More
When my daughter was born, I must admit there was... Read More
whole house cleaning Park Ridge ..Most of us can agree that there is a lack... Read More
In seminars I am often asked about pocket-money and whether... Read More
It used to strike me as odd - but really,... Read More
Sara loves pampering. Haircuts, facials, manicures, and makeup bring smiles,... Read More
All children will likely have many different health problems during... Read More
I don't know how people raise daughters because I have... Read More
This year alone, 1,600 teenagers aged 15 to 19 will... Read More
The most common medications used in the treatment of Attention... Read More
Tripping over the shoes and toys that seem to clutter... Read More
Although, not a well publicized statistic, childhood obesity has more... Read More
The cost of being a parent and raising a child... Read More
For every season, check, check, check, There is a chart,... Read More
You can learn a lot from children.The best part of... Read More
Now is an excellent time to have your child's vision... Read More
My son is 6 yrs old. He came home the... Read More
As a mom of 4 who's youngest child is about... Read More
There are many reasons for treating your twins as individuals... Read More
My husband and I have a 12-year-old daughter who wanted... Read More
As parents, we love our children and want to do... Read More
Fall marks the beginning of many new things both for... Read More
Does this sound familiar? Have your kids not listened to... Read More
It's back to school time again. Does the thought of... Read More
Do you ever wonder what is behind the occasional nasty... Read More
Here's a scene: A parent "might suddenly grab a happliy... Read More
1. Make stronger connections among individuals and, therefore, creates a... Read More
Parenting |