We were sitting in the family room. My kids had finished their first day back at school after the holiday break, and my wife was working late. Michael, my six-year-old son, was finger knitting. Sarah, my eight-year-old, was knitting a scarf. I sat near them and folded clothes. Occasionally someone would share something that had happened during the day, but otherwise it was quiet.
And as we sat there doing our chores, I began to appreciate this time we were spending together. The orgy of presents, travel, and Christmas cookies was over. The routines and rhythms of the work week had begun again. My kids needed structure as badly as I did. We were getting it by being together in this quiet, simple way.
As I sat there folding clothes, I marveled at how little we really needed to be happy. It was quite enough just to be together as we did our work. Many of the gifts my kids received for Christmas were already put away. As often happens, there was a brief flurry of excitement when the gifts were first discovered. Shortly after, the thrill of ownership faded away. And while my kids may be too young to understand it, I'd like them to know that possessions don't really make them happy. When you live in a consumer-driven and materialistic society, it's just the message you receive. As author Christopher Lasch states, "A mass advertising culture creates consumers who are perpetually unsatisfied, restless, anxious, and bored."
I'd like my kids to know someday that the pursuit of possessions has made more people unhappy than happy, and that it actually ends up limiting their freedom of choice in the world. I'd like them to know that possessions can keep them focused on their own self-interest, rather than focusing on how they can benefit others. And I'd like them to know that one of the keys to a happy life is the pursuit of simple pleasures, which, in today's day and age, is an act of courage.
I thought about all of the possessions I had somewhere in the house. How many of them had I really used in the last 6 months? How many of them really had an impact on my life or made me happy beyond the first few minutes of receiving them?
Only a handful.
And as I sat there with my kids enjoying our time together, I sensed that more trips to the Goodwill were in order, as well as a greater commitment to simple living in our family. John Burroughs, the nineteenth-century naturalist, observed that "the number of things we can really make our own is limited. We cannot drink from the ocean be we ever so thirsty. A cup of water from the spring is all we need."
As parents in America today, we're often made to feel thirsty. We're made to feel as though we need to provide the latest gadgets for ourselves and for our children. And it seems that at the rate we're going, these gadgets will cost us most of our money and most of our time.
Don't be fooled. All that you and your kids really need is a "cup of water from the spring." It may not impress your neighbors, but it will help your family to feel happier.
It may even change your attitude about folding clothes!
Mark Brandenburg MA, CPCC, coaches busy parents by phone to balance their life and improve their family relationships. For a FREE twenty minute sample session by phone, ebooks and courses for fathers, articles, and a FREE weekly newsletter, go to http://www.markbrandenburg.com. or email him at http://www.markbrandenburg.com..
no-contract cleaning service Mundelein ..Potty training fears, often called toilet terrors, are common among... Read More
Public education in the United States has never been equal... Read More
Julia Roberts recently gave birth to twins: Hazel and Phinnaeus.... Read More
Here are some tips that I have picked up from... Read More
Have you ever sat and watch a child struggle with... Read More
As a mom of 4 who's youngest child is about... Read More
You need to smart to be able influence adolescents. You... Read More
The subject of competition is one that provokes some pretty... Read More
1. Encourage your babysitter by keeping their favorite foods/snacks on... Read More
We are all familiar with the stories that most students... Read More
Dear friends here we will charge up our mind with... Read More
"To educate a person in mind and not in morals... Read More
There are a LOT of alternative treatments for sale out... Read More
Not nearly as often as it should. Most child abuse... Read More
Why do some children still do best after divorce and... Read More
Memorizing math facts is a necessary part of elementary school.... Read More
Every now and then I'll get a story sent to... Read More
When you talk about multiply your child's intelligence, you can't... Read More
What's new and effective in the treatment of Attention problems?... Read More
When a child is born, a new number is added... Read More
The key to a successful car wash fundraiser event is... Read More
Here is something that you might want to keep if... Read More
The biggest trick some child predators' are using these days... Read More
This can be a very complicated issue, so I don't... Read More
From criticizing a spouse, to claming up about one's own... Read More
maid service near Glenview ..Do you have a wild child? Then this article may... Read More
There isn't a school day that goes by that I... Read More
Dear MomOn this day set aside to honour "Mother's" let... Read More
Once upon a time there was a beautiful bird whose... Read More
Every school year parents and students dutifully trudge through the... Read More
Child Car Seat Safety:We know you love your children, but... Read More
Do your children have a McChildhood? Do they experience the... Read More
If your child or teen has been diagnosed with Attention... Read More
We were all teens at one time for some many... Read More
We're all familiar with the over-indulgent parent. But there's another... Read More
Many parents struggle with solutions to put their child on... Read More
Yesterday my husband Wade took the day off (that's one... Read More
When my son was 18 (and had finished school), he... Read More
Choosing to leave your child with a caregiver is one... Read More
When my oldest boy was really young, he tickled my... Read More
The popularity of EEG Biofeedback Training continues to grow both... Read More
Chaim Ginott was a schoolteacher whose ideas and observations helped... Read More
"Before every action, ask yourself: Will this bring more monkeys... Read More
The key to lifelong learning is reading and writing. When... Read More
Many research studies have shown the overall effectiveness of stimulant... Read More
1. They are leaders as well as parents. They don't... Read More
Q. How do I overcome the 16-year-old who does things... Read More
Meningitis is an inflammation of the membranes around the brain... Read More
You can learn a lot from children.The best part of... Read More
As the flurry of Back to School activities subside, parents... Read More
Parenting |