We were all teens at one time for some many years ago even if we don't like to admit it. Many of us can look back and say our teen years were good, but with many ups and downs as we approached adulthood. Some of us maybe were lucky enough to have parents we could talk to about anything with ease. Today's teens deal with many of the same issues, but also deal with some very difficult issues that are more prevalent in today's youth.
Your teen will need guidance and most likely seek advice. As parents we need to help insure that our teens will come to us with most of these issues. We need to create an atmosphere that will encourage our teens to turn to us. It can be quite a task to get your teen to open up and I found with my teenage boys they were a little reluctant to discuss personal issues. It's quite normal for your teen to seem more distant as they work their way to adulthood. Many times they will seek advice from their peers, but don't worry, this is normal for kids this age.
Peers play a big part in the teenage years and strong healthy relationships with their peers is important to them. More importantly though, I believe they need to be able to relate and confide in their parents as much as possible. It's likely this will not happen without some encouragement from the parents. Making ourselves available, showing we understand, and that they can talk openly with us without judgment plays a key factor in getting them to open up and feel comfortable doing so.
Some issues today's teens face may be difficult or uncomfortable to discuss, but looking the other way will not help. If they can't come to you they will seek advice or help elsewhere. Personally, I would much rather have my teen come to me regardless of the topic, rather than turn to another source who does not love and care for them the way I do. We as parents don't want our teens turning to someone who may not have their best interests in mind.
The guidance and advice they receive during these wonderful, but yet difficult years can impact the choices they make in the future, therefore, the present time is crucial. While some decisions they may have to make will seem insignificant, some could affect the rest of their lives. Whether the importance is big or small they need to know they can turn to their parents for everything.
I have found with my teens, by offering stories or comparisons to when I was their age, is an effective way to get the conversation started. In a relaxed one on one situation, casually bringing things up opened the door to allow my boys to talk about a similar situation they may have experienced. Sometimes, they tend to refer to a friend that was going through something similar, which very well could be the case, but at the same time, I take it as a hint. If a close peer is going through it, most likely, they are too or will be.
By letting teens know through comparison, that when you were a teen, you too had similar issues and was once their age, will encourage them to open up. Will everything they want to talk about be a major dilemma? The answer is No. Will they suddenly spill their guts and divulge everything to you from this point on? Not likely because it takes time to establish that kind of trust. Yes, they have been your kids for many years and they trust you, but this is Trust taken to a whole new level.
The idea is to keep the lines of communication open, show them you care, that you understand and you are there for them. Build a strong level of trust with your teen and hopefully when the big issues come up, you may be the first to know.
This article is written by Tammy Pinarbasi, Owner of the Parent Super Site, http://www.parentsupersite.com. You may reprint this article or use it on your website, however, please be sure to link back to this site. Thank You...
best cleaning company Lincolnshire ..IntroductionAs a parent who wants the best for your children,... Read More
One of the questions I ask in parenting presentations is... Read More
Diagnosing children and teens with ADHD can be a challenge.... Read More
1. The Law of the BeastAs parents we need to... Read More
In speaking with parents a comment I frequently hear is... Read More
If your parenting methods include abuse of any kind; physical,... Read More
There are times when my ideas of raising a child... Read More
Research literature, recent books, and common sense, all point to... Read More
Many reasons will cause some people to feel the need... Read More
Bath time can be fun or it can be a... Read More
The key to a successful car wash fundraiser event is... Read More
Research published by University of Rochester neuroscientists C. Shawn Green... Read More
As parents, we love our children and want to do... Read More
One of parents' most important duties is to protect their... Read More
As a mom of 4 who's youngest child is about... Read More
Is it hard to communicate with your teenager about issues... Read More
I could nearly fund my children's future education if I... Read More
For the most positive daycare experience for your child, partner... Read More
"Money is tight, and my husband's obsessed with doing everything... Read More
It's that time again! Parent-teacher conferences are coming. Are you... Read More
A friend phoned her neighbor, complaining about the wafts of... Read More
Predicament:My son is 4 1/2 years old. His younger brother... Read More
Every summer our daughter goes to summer camp. She looks... Read More
When a child wets the bed they worry. Children tend... Read More
Some public schools try to turn children against their parents... Read More
on demand house cleaning Lake Forest ..Raising a pre-teen or teenage daughter (or son) is not... Read More
Coping with a child's bad behavior, perhaps more than any... Read More
Q. We are getting to the stage with our kids... Read More
Younger generations unfortunately will not understand how larger than life... Read More
"I WON'T DO IT!" "YOU CAN'T MAKE ME!"Whether parent or... Read More
In today's busy world, many parents have lost the art... Read More
Whether children attend public or private schools, they benefit when... Read More
Here we will come to know who are the most... Read More
Article based on a friend's experienceI just wanted to share... Read More
Many companies advertise their products as being educational. How much... Read More
Saturday mornings. Cold cereal and Scooby Doo. How many parents... Read More
Until the moment I became a mother, I couldn't quite... Read More
A strange thing happened to me today. Or more precisely,... Read More
This can be a very complicated issue, so I don't... Read More
Imagine yourself lying flat on your back, totally strapped down... Read More
Identity and Your Fraternal TwinFor the most part, throughout this... Read More
My husband and I have a 12-year-old daughter who wanted... Read More
Bedtime and children's sleep habits can cause nightmares - for... Read More
Child care costs are are one of the most expensive... Read More
I will never forget the day that my daughter's sixth... Read More
In school, kids are encouraged to create, draw, color, paint... Read More
We were sitting in the family room. My kids had... Read More
Grandparents, what better way to stay close to your grown... Read More
Here are fourteen spontaneous time-outs, specially designed to help you... Read More
Let's face it.The job market is getting tougher every day.Computerization... Read More
Parenting |