We were all teens at one time for some many years ago even if we don't like to admit it. Many of us can look back and say our teen years were good, but with many ups and downs as we approached adulthood. Some of us maybe were lucky enough to have parents we could talk to about anything with ease. Today's teens deal with many of the same issues, but also deal with some very difficult issues that are more prevalent in today's youth.
Your teen will need guidance and most likely seek advice. As parents we need to help insure that our teens will come to us with most of these issues. We need to create an atmosphere that will encourage our teens to turn to us. It can be quite a task to get your teen to open up and I found with my teenage boys they were a little reluctant to discuss personal issues. It's quite normal for your teen to seem more distant as they work their way to adulthood. Many times they will seek advice from their peers, but don't worry, this is normal for kids this age.
Peers play a big part in the teenage years and strong healthy relationships with their peers is important to them. More importantly though, I believe they need to be able to relate and confide in their parents as much as possible. It's likely this will not happen without some encouragement from the parents. Making ourselves available, showing we understand, and that they can talk openly with us without judgment plays a key factor in getting them to open up and feel comfortable doing so.
Some issues today's teens face may be difficult or uncomfortable to discuss, but looking the other way will not help. If they can't come to you they will seek advice or help elsewhere. Personally, I would much rather have my teen come to me regardless of the topic, rather than turn to another source who does not love and care for them the way I do. We as parents don't want our teens turning to someone who may not have their best interests in mind.
The guidance and advice they receive during these wonderful, but yet difficult years can impact the choices they make in the future, therefore, the present time is crucial. While some decisions they may have to make will seem insignificant, some could affect the rest of their lives. Whether the importance is big or small they need to know they can turn to their parents for everything.
I have found with my teens, by offering stories or comparisons to when I was their age, is an effective way to get the conversation started. In a relaxed one on one situation, casually bringing things up opened the door to allow my boys to talk about a similar situation they may have experienced. Sometimes, they tend to refer to a friend that was going through something similar, which very well could be the case, but at the same time, I take it as a hint. If a close peer is going through it, most likely, they are too or will be.
By letting teens know through comparison, that when you were a teen, you too had similar issues and was once their age, will encourage them to open up. Will everything they want to talk about be a major dilemma? The answer is No. Will they suddenly spill their guts and divulge everything to you from this point on? Not likely because it takes time to establish that kind of trust. Yes, they have been your kids for many years and they trust you, but this is Trust taken to a whole new level.
The idea is to keep the lines of communication open, show them you care, that you understand and you are there for them. Build a strong level of trust with your teen and hopefully when the big issues come up, you may be the first to know.
This article is written by Tammy Pinarbasi, Owner of the Parent Super Site, http://www.parentsupersite.com. You may reprint this article or use it on your website, however, please be sure to link back to this site. Thank You...
recurring cleaning service Wilmette ..I remember when my daughter was born, later my son.... Read More
You are at the grocery store with your daughter and... Read More
Arabella Greatorex, owner of The Natural Nursery, reports on the... Read More
In an actual war, to be attacked means to have... Read More
The 'phone conversation had nothing at all to do with... Read More
Gift shops are a kid magnet and often a trip... Read More
Prenatal intelligence, also known as fetal intelligence, has become a... Read More
Have you ever wondered why toys for babies tend to... Read More
Dear friends here we will charge up our mind with... Read More
I'll never forget my first lesson in a glider.I'd been... Read More
Parents play a critical role in their child's success. These... Read More
"Get down from the table top right now! What are... Read More
The Flow of WaterWater is essential for life on the... Read More
Q. I don't like my children spending so much time... Read More
As a parent, you probably know that the birthday party... Read More
Thank you for all that you do in the classroom!... Read More
Dear Vijay,I worry about not being a good parent. My... Read More
Child tantrums are a way for children to express their... Read More
Have you ever had this struggle with your teens? Did... Read More
Imagine yourself lying flat on your back, totally strapped down... Read More
Q. My daughter is a junior in high school and... Read More
Sitterphobe "I never have a second to myself," this mother... Read More
Ritalin has been shown through the years to be very... Read More
For every season, check, check, check, There is a chart,... Read More
Memorizing math facts is a necessary part of elementary school.... Read More
reliable maid service Morton Grove ..Not all parents subscribe to the notion of "tough love,"... Read More
An estimated five million scooters will be sold this year... Read More
Advocate: you've probably heard the term before. But what does... Read More
The distressed adolescent often has feelings of abandonment, emotional detachment,... Read More
Mommy (Daddy), Why do those people want to hurt everyone?Last... Read More
Children think money grows on trees. Maybe not literally, but... Read More
The key to a successful car wash fundraiser event is... Read More
Child Safety Restraints and children in work vehiclesIf you take... Read More
There are only two ways to get more money:1) Increase... Read More
Dan Rather made a significant and tactical error and got... Read More
"Good parents give their children Roots and Wings." --Jonas SalkThe... Read More
If your child has Attention Deficit Hyperactivity Disorder then at... Read More
As Mother's Day approaches I would like to give a... Read More
"Family Matters" was the headline that caught my attention in... Read More
So you have just returned home from your third meeting... Read More
Until the moment I became a mother, I couldn't quite... Read More
Information is gold when you are adopted. Every tiny piece... Read More
Vacations are fun ! Weekends with the family are nice.... Read More
One of the few decisions you'll make during pregnancy that... Read More
1. Boundaries are necessary for control and safety.All children need... Read More
Encouragement comes when you focus on your child's assets and... Read More
Bi-Polar Disorder, or Manic Depression, is characterized by mood swings,... Read More
Certainly we all want our children to excel. But it... Read More
In this form of treatment for attention deficit hyperactivity disorder... Read More
Boredom, limited space and overflowing energy are a source of... Read More
Parenting |