There are moments in a parent's or grandparent's life, when they receive validation for the way they are living, or, have lived, that life. These moments are usually quiet ones, with no fanfare celebrating the occasion. Yet, the importance of these moments has no equal. To those of us who have given of our time, our love, our care, ourselves, they are of far greater private, personal significance, than can be stated.
A few years ago, I found myself in a personally trying situation. It was during this period that I was paid what I feel will be the finest compliment I shall ever receive. It concerned my conduct during this time. My eldest daughter remarked that she believed me to be the most honorable person she would ever know. For me, as a parent, it was a defining moment.
I was blessed with another such moment recently, courtesy of my eldest grandson. Although he's a teenager now, we maintain the close relationship begun in his early years. We enjoy conversing. No subject is taboo, and he feels free to discuss whatever is of interest to him, or of concern. On this particular occasion, he was endeavoring to put into words, his feelings concerning something that was of great importance to him. By his demeanor, his urgency of voice, I realized this was something with which he had been struggling.
He began by seeking my opinion. What did I think of people who were always changing? Well, I remarked, in life, it's good to remain flexible. Narrow-minded thinking limits a person's potential. He shook his head. No, he wasn't talking about that. He said he realized a person must have an open mind. He was speaking of how people live their lives. I listened to him, as he continued endeavoring to impart his meaning to me. Suddenly the meaning dawned on me. I asked if he were talking about personal honor. Was he referring to the personal rules of conduct we adopt for ourselves, the morals we choose? Yes, he replied, that was it exactly! Why, he wanted to know, did people sometimes abandon these? Wasn't that like not being true to yourself? Didn't they feel bad about themselves? Wasn't that like letting your self down?
I looked at this young man, this human being for whom I feel so much love, and chose my next words with great care. Yes, son, I said to him, it's letting your self down. Choosing actions that go against your personal code of honor diminishes you, as a human being. Even during the most trying times in life, especially during those times, remaining true to your self is of utmost importance. Even when certain actions are perfectly acceptable to others, or when they seem to be the easier choices, or when said actions may in some way benefit you in the short term. In the end, if they go against your core beliefs, you will carry the ill consequences with you, for the rest of your life.
He listened intently to my words. I could see him weighing them, mulling over the concept. He then nodded, and replied that yes, he understood. He went on to say that there were things he felt he would not, could not do, and stay true to himself. He stated what I had told him was like when a person does something wrong, and even if no one else ever knows, the person who does the act carries the guilt of it. He remarked that he hoped he would be strong enough, in life, to never let him self down. I replied that I had great faith in the fact that he would indeed, have enough strength. He smiled, and said, I love you Grams. In a voice touched with deep pride, and sincere affection, I replied that I was rather fond of him, too.
There are moments, in the lives of parents and grandparents...
Jeannine Schenewerk is a freelance writer residing in Atlanta, Georgia. She maintains an informative, upbeat site for mature women at: http://www.intouchwithjeannine.com
executive chauffeured services Bradford .. Madison to Airport carSome public schools try to turn children against their parents... Read More
According to the American Sleep Association 70% of all babies... Read More
Everyone in a private practice setting who works with children... Read More
Successful parents have learned to be both firm and kind... Read More
"It takes a village to raise a child" is more... Read More
Last night Tom's daughter, Sue, came out of her room... Read More
"Life consists not in holding good cards but in playing... Read More
Giving advice to a teenager is very easy; getting a... Read More
O.K. So now you have taken the step of having... Read More
My wife and I have been working on a video... Read More
Every now and then I'll get a story sent to... Read More
Seven-year old Michael was on a school trip to a... Read More
Single parents are not often thought of as good parents.I... Read More
(Isaiah 11:6 KJV) The wolf also shall dwell with the... Read More
The last decade has seen heightened interest in and awareness... Read More
Most people have more training before they receive their driver's... Read More
Can you draw a straight line? Most adults don't consider... Read More
Depending on where you live school will be starting this... Read More
If you really want to get your children to eat... Read More
There are two methods for teaching children to read; whole... Read More
More and more parents are expressing their concerns about how... Read More
Did you know that inconsistency on matters of discipline gives... Read More
Goal setting is essential for building a successful life. However,... Read More
Quite simply, an absolute nightmare for parents and babies alike,... Read More
Assuming there are no serious motor problems present, what can... Read More
O'Hare Chicago prom limo ..In this form of treatment for attention deficit hyperactivity disorder... Read More
If your child or teen has been diagnosed with Attention... Read More
When planning a child birthday party, just a little bit... Read More
Did you know that you are the most important person... Read More
Anorexia nervosa is a serious medical disorder that is statistically... Read More
When kids try new things, sometimes it's a 'fit' and... Read More
Before going further into choosing computers for children, I believe... Read More
Keith is now in the fourth grade and he dislikes... Read More
"The greatest gift I ever had Came from God, and... Read More
For first time parents choosing a swing set or outdoor... Read More
If you visit search engines you can find several resources... Read More
Do any other reality TV junkies remember a show on... Read More
If you really want to get your children to eat... Read More
Managing money is one of the most critical skills we... Read More
Q: Whenever we tell my daughter "no," she just bugs... Read More
It's been raining for a week and the kids and... Read More
Coping with a child's bad behavior, perhaps more than any... Read More
Lead is one of the most dangerous toxins a person... Read More
All babies cry, but if yours cries a lot, isn't... Read More
In theory, working at home is an ideal situation. But... Read More
According to researchers, most children enter school with a good... Read More
A study done by the Thomas B. Fordham Institute found... Read More
As parents, we love our children and want to do... Read More
Childhood friendships are as special as they are a necessary... Read More
When my oldest boy was really young, he tickled my... Read More
Parenting |