Parenting Your Teenager: Truth or Lie?

Attention all parents of teen-agers. Here is an important, groundbreaking and even shocking bulletin for you:

According to research conducted at the prestigious-sounding Josephson Institute of Ethics in, of course, California, here are two startling pieces of information:

1) 92 percent of teens surveyed admitted to lying to their parents at least once in the last year.

2) 78 percent of teens surveyed admitted to lying to their teachers at least once in the past year.

Have you gotten up off the floor yet?

Please forgive my sarcasm, but to put it in the language of the age group surveyed:

Well, duh.

If you are the parent of a teen-ager, I doubt you are at all surprised by these findings.

The results of my own scientific poll, conducted in three days of talking with the teens and parents I see in my office, give us these comments on the subject of teens lying to parents and/or teachers:

Only 92 percent?

The other 8 percent are lying.

Like they are really going to be honest on some lame survey.

I hope my parents don't read that article.

And other things really not printable.

So is it wrong to lie to your parents and teachers?

Of course.

Is honesty an issue of integrity and character?

Of course.

Do teens lie to their parents and teachers?

Of course.

So let's deal with it.

Tips for teens

File this under the care and feeding of parents:

Parents would rather know the truth the first time, no matter how ugly and horrible it might be, than to find out later that you lied.

Although it's sometimes hard to believe, parents were teen-agers once themselves. Which means that they know the lying game, and if they are paying attention, have a fairly good idea of when their kids are lying.

Here's a basic decision you need to make that will greatly affect your living-at-home years: Are my parents the enemy and I have to lie to get around them and get what I think I want, or can my parents be guides I can consult and trust to get me out into the real world?

Tips for parents

Is it possible to be able to always tell when your kids are telling the truth or lying to you? Nope, haven't found that technology yet. But here are a few guidelines you can use that will give you a pretty good idea of what is really going on:

Does the story you are hearing match what you already know?

Does it match what the parents of your kids' friends and/or your neighbors tell you? (Are you talking to them?)

Does it match what your kids' teachers are telling you? (Are you talking to them?)

In how many ways can you check out anything that you are in doubt about?

Do your kids fidget or have difficulty looking you in the eye when they are talking to you?

Here's the one that has been my guide for 25 years of family counseling:

Does the behavior match the words?

Again, in the best of all possible worlds, kids won't lie simply because it is wrong and damages trust. Until we discover the best of all possible worlds, we'll just have to deal with what is.

In the meantime, let's be on the lookout for new surveys that will tell us that a high percentage of teen-agers like loud music and talking on the phone.

Visit secretsofgreatrelationships.com for tips and tools for creating and growing a great relationship. You can also subscribe to our f*r*e*e 10 day e-program on how to enrich your relationship today, from relationship coach and expert Jeff Herring.

executive chauffeured services Bradford .. Madison to Airport car
In The News:

Getting virus alerts on your iPhone? Tech expert Kurt “CyberGuy" Knutsson helps you learn how to handle fake scam alerts and boost security.
Tech expert Kurt “CyberGuy" Knutsson says opening emails is safe, but risks arise from interacting with links, attachments or HTML content.
Tech expert Kurt “CyberGuy" Knutsson reveals four signs of compromised Social Security numbers and offers five steps to protect yourself.
Tech expert Kurt “CyberGuy" Knutsson discusses how MAB Robotics' Honey Badger 4.0, a versatile robot, now walks underwater with amphibious skills.
An updated Android trojan called FakeCall hijacks bank calls. Tech expert Kurt “CyberGuy" Knutsson says Android phone manufacturers and Google need to step up their game on security.
The Massimo Modular E9 is a sleek, smart and comfy tiny home in 409 square feet. Tech expert Kurt “CyberGuy" Knutsson takes a closer look at what the future of housing might look like.
Every stock trader should consider a virtual private network to safeguard their trading, according to tech guru Kurt "CyberGuy" Knutsson.
Apple recently announced its new lineup of Macs and rolled out Apple Intelligence, its latest artificial intelligence-powered feature for its products.
A Swiss-engineered robot can climb ladders, showing why it's at the cutting edge of autonomous robotic solutions for harsh industrial settings.
Kurt "CyberGuy" Knutsson presents the cities targeted most by robocalls, why this is happening and what you can do about it to protect your privacy.
Stay up to date on the latest AI technology advancements and learn about the challenges and opportunities AI presents
Kurt "CyberGuy" Knutsson shares tips and suggestions for how to get the best use out of the updated Calendar app available with the latest iOS update.
Your Social Security number, your unique identifier used for many purposes, has likely been leaked on the Dark Web; here are some steps you can take to protect yourself.
Researchers have developed a new technology that creates strong, sticky fibers capable of lifting objects and capturing things from a distance.
Smart rings track the same things that smartwatches do, including steps, sleep and a general overview of your overall health, and they tend have more battery life than smartwatches.
Researchers have developed a robotic finger that can perform routine medical exams like those conducted by doctors, helping to address the growing shortage of trained professionals.
Stay up to date on the latest AI technology advancements and learn about the challenges and opportunities AI presents now and for the future.
Insurance administrative services company Landmark Admin reported that a data breach from a May cyberattack affected over 800,000 people.
Sotheby's will auction the first artwork created by Ai-Da, the world's first robot artist created in 2019 by British gallerist Aidan Meller.
More than 250 million users of the Verizon Messages app will have to switch to another app. Verizon is shutting down Messages in the next month.
Tech expert Kurt “CyberGuy" Knutsson provides a list of 10 celebrities who are the most targeted by deepfake scams, including Tom Hanks.
Tech expert Kurt “CyberGuy" Knutsson discusses how Vast's Haven-1, launching in 2025, transforms space living with human-centric design.
UnitedHealth confirms over 100 million Change Healthcare users had their data stolen. Kurt “CyberGuy" Knutsson reveals what happened and what caused the breach.
Tech expert Kurt “CyberGuy" Knutsson explains how iOS 18 brings new text formatting and animated effects to the Messages app.
Whether you're a social media veteran or novice, Facebook friend request scams are common. Kurt the CyberGuy provides tips to keep your account safe.

Nothing Like a Mothers Love

Travel is a common theme in my life -- probably... Read More

Managing Your Stepfamily

If you are a member of a stepfamily, you know... Read More

Raising a Violent-Free Teen in 10 Easy Steps

The disquieting behavior of teenagers in the 21st century, is... Read More

Confident Children - Avoid Overparenting

For many years underparenting was perhaps the biggest problem facing... Read More

Unilateral Disarmament - The First Step to Improving Communications with Your Teenagers

Many times, we are so conditioned in how we speak... Read More

Educational Toys - How Do Parents Choose The Best Toys For Their Child

The choices are mind numbing. Walk into any toy store... Read More

Friendships - Helping Children Develop Friendship Skills

Reasearch into children's friendships shows that those children who are... Read More

Misplaced Passion

"Before every action, ask yourself: Will this bring more monkeys... Read More

The Better Behavior Wheel - A New Kind of Calm in the Family

There's a new kind of fun and calm out there... Read More

Things To Teach Your Teenage Driver

Is it hard to communicate with your teenager about issues... Read More

10 Steps to School Year Success

One of the most important aspects of parenting, is ensuring... Read More

Childrens Discipline: How To Resolve Divorce Parenting Differences?

Did you know that inconsistency on matters of discipline gives... Read More

Teach Your Child About Money

What are we teaching our children about money? Hopefully something!I... Read More

Marriages May End But Families Are Forever

It was at that time when our marriage was falling... Read More

Parenting Skills - Five Ways To Turbo-Boost Your Confidence

The 'phone conversation had nothing at all to do with... Read More

How A Home Water Filter Can Reduce Your Child?s Risk Of Learning Disabilities

Lead is one of the most dangerous toxins a person... Read More

Coping With Colic

Quite simply, an absolute nightmare for parents and babies alike,... Read More

A Dads Thoughts On Dads day

21 Reasons I Love Being A DadWhat you will read... Read More

Gaining a Child?s Trust

My daughters and I went to the beach several weeks... Read More

STOP Parental Alienation Syndrome before It Gets a Chance to START

Parental Alienation Syndrome was probably first identified and codified by... Read More

Children Who Talk to Angels

What do you do when your child begins talking to... Read More

Dyslexia: Is the Shoe Perhaps on the Wrong Foot?

Reading is the most important skill that a child must... Read More

Send Your Child to College FREE!

College is one of the largest expenses through the course... Read More

Ten Ways To Become Your Teenagers Best Friend

Best friends! It may seem impossible to believe, but today's... Read More

Lets Not Hurry Children Through Childhood

Have you ever experienced one of those days when you... Read More

O'Hare Chicago prom limo ..