Home
>
Parenting
>
Parenting Your Teenager: Of Course You Can Search Your Teens Room

Parenting Your Teenager: Of Course You Can Search Your Teens Room

Q. We recently caught our son smoking pot, and we wonder whether he's doing more stuff. We have reason to believe he has been hiding drugs in his room, and we're wondering whether we should go into his room to see whether we can find anything. Some parents we've talked to say yes. Others say, "Don't invade his privacy because you will lose his trust." What do you think we should do?

A. Based on more than 25 years of working with teen-agers and families, I suggest:

Absolutely, yes, go check out his room.

I say this for at least three reasons:

1) It's your house.

You bought it. You pay the mortgage. You can go anywhere in the house you wish to go.

End of story.

2) You have reason to believe that there is something dangerous in your son's room.

If you knew there was a poisonous snake or a ticking bomb in his room, would you want to go in and get it out?

Of course.

You have reason to believe there is something both poisonous and explosive in his room.

Find out and get it out.

3) While you are correct to believe that trust is a crucial issue here, the trust between you already has been broken.

Your son broke it when he began to smoke pot and keep it from you. And in my experience, there is usually more that you do not know behind what you have already discovered.

Your first job is to get him safe, and then you can work on rebuilding the trust.

You can look through his room and then deal with him about whatever you find. Another way to look through his room is to do it with him, and then you get to deal with whatever you find as you find it.

Either way, he certainly won't like it much, but that is not the issue.

Visit parentingyourteenager.com for tips and tools for thriving during the teen years. You can also subscribe to our f*r*e*e 5 day e-program on parentingyourteenager.com

executive chauffeured services Bradford .. Madison to Airport car

In The News:

Getting virus alerts on your iPhone? Tech expert Kurt “CyberGuy" Knutsson helps you learn how to handle fake scam alerts and boost security.

Tech expert Kurt “CyberGuy" Knutsson says opening emails is safe, but risks arise from interacting with links, attachments or HTML content.

Tech expert Kurt “CyberGuy" Knutsson reveals four signs of compromised Social Security numbers and offers five steps to protect yourself.

Tech expert Kurt “CyberGuy" Knutsson discusses how MAB Robotics' Honey Badger 4.0, a versatile robot, now walks underwater with amphibious skills.

An updated Android trojan called FakeCall hijacks bank calls. Tech expert Kurt “CyberGuy" Knutsson says Android phone manufacturers and Google need to step up their game on security.

The Massimo Modular E9 is a sleek, smart and comfy tiny home in 409 square feet. Tech expert Kurt “CyberGuy" Knutsson takes a closer look at what the future of housing might look like.

Every stock trader should consider a virtual private network to safeguard their trading, according to tech guru Kurt "CyberGuy" Knutsson.

Apple recently announced its new lineup of Macs and rolled out Apple Intelligence, its latest artificial intelligence-powered feature for its products.

A Swiss-engineered robot can climb ladders, showing why it's at the cutting edge of autonomous robotic solutions for harsh industrial settings.

Kurt "CyberGuy" Knutsson presents the cities targeted most by robocalls, why this is happening and what you can do about it to protect your privacy.

Stay up to date on the latest AI technology advancements and learn about the challenges and opportunities AI presents

Kurt "CyberGuy" Knutsson shares tips and suggestions for how to get the best use out of the updated Calendar app available with the latest iOS update.

Your Social Security number, your unique identifier used for many purposes, has likely been leaked on the Dark Web; here are some steps you can take to protect yourself.

Researchers have developed a new technology that creates strong, sticky fibers capable of lifting objects and capturing things from a distance.

Smart rings track the same things that smartwatches do, including steps, sleep and a general overview of your overall health, and they tend have more battery life than smartwatches.

Researchers have developed a robotic finger that can perform routine medical exams like those conducted by doctors, helping to address the growing shortage of trained professionals.

Stay up to date on the latest AI technology advancements and learn about the challenges and opportunities AI presents now and for the future.

Insurance administrative services company Landmark Admin reported that a data breach from a May cyberattack affected over 800,000 people.

Sotheby's will auction the first artwork created by Ai-Da, the world's first robot artist created in 2019 by British gallerist Aidan Meller.

More than 250 million users of the Verizon Messages app will have to switch to another app. Verizon is shutting down Messages in the next month.

Tech expert Kurt “CyberGuy" Knutsson provides a list of 10 celebrities who are the most targeted by deepfake scams, including Tom Hanks.

Tech expert Kurt “CyberGuy" Knutsson discusses how Vast's Haven-1, launching in 2025, transforms space living with human-centric design.

UnitedHealth confirms over 100 million Change Healthcare users had their data stolen. Kurt “CyberGuy" Knutsson reveals what happened and what caused the breach.

Tech expert Kurt “CyberGuy" Knutsson explains how iOS 18 brings new text formatting and animated effects to the Messages app.

Whether you're a social media veteran or novice, Facebook friend request scams are common. Kurt the CyberGuy provides tips to keep your account safe.