Q. Things have been relatively calm and OK with our 16-year-old son so far. Now all of a sudden, there is a huge battle about curfew. He wants to stay out later and later, and we don't think he is ready. How do we set appropriate curfew in our house?
A. Here are a few basic principles on which you and your teen can build:
*Curfew is for the convenience of the parents, not the teens. Parents want to know what time their teens will be home so the parents can sleep when they need to. Be careful not to get this principle turned around the wrong way.
*There should be a later curfew on the weekend than on weeknights.
*One or more evenings should be family nights when everyone is home.
*Sunday nights are not weekend nights, they are school nights.
A Curfew Program You Both Can Handle
Here's how to set up a curfew program that you can live with.
Pick a beginning curfew. Let's say 11 p.m., for example.
Of course, your son will want it to be later. Tell him there is a way to get there and you are going to provide him with a map.
If he honors the 11 p.m. curfew for four months, then he will have earned an additional 15 minutes added to his curfew.
If at any time during the four-month period he comes in late, then the earning period starts all over again the next day.
Choose times and time periods that fit for your family and situation.
The nice thing about this curfew system is that it puts the parents clearly in charge, gives the teen something to work toward, and provides both the parents and the teen clear markers of progress.
Leading parenting expert Jeff Herring is a teen and family therapist, parenting coach, speaker and syndicated parenting and relationship columnist. Jeff invites you to visit parentingyourteenager.com for 100's of tips and tools for parenting through the teenage years. You can also subscribe to his f'ree weekly internet newsletter "ParenitngYourTeenager."
whole house cleaning Highland Park ..Because most teens have not had the experience of getting... Read More
Q. Our 17-year-old son wants us to let his girlfriend... Read More
Here's a scene: A parent "might suddenly grab a happliy... Read More
In the wonderment of childhood, it is easier for a... Read More
In the news, we hear and see an increasing number... Read More
While most fathers aspire to become the best Dads they... Read More
Nanny 911 Interview with Montel WilliamsI saw an interview with... Read More
We know that ancient cultures and Indians and the like... Read More
It was a day that I will forever be etched... Read More
Dear Sir, It was with some interest that I read... Read More
Parental example, whether for good or for bad, is undoubtedly... Read More
Researching career education uncovered the following shocking statistic: The average... Read More
Many families today are blending members from past relationships. It... Read More
How do we deal with our seriously distressed children and... Read More
As I sit here and reflect on the past two... Read More
IntroductionAs a parent who wants the best for your children,... Read More
Reasearch into children's friendships shows that those children who are... Read More
Imagine having no television for an entire season. Such was... Read More
Q: My husband and I are at a loss as... Read More
On a recent Saturday evening, I noticed a young teen-age... Read More
Did you know that the school system is only able... Read More
If your child is to derive the benefits of physical... Read More
This can be a very complicated issue, so I don't... Read More
Dear Sir, It was with some interest that I read... Read More
There are many parenting styles. Yours may be very different... Read More
pet-friendly home cleaners Glenview ..Can you draw a straight line? Most adults don't consider... Read More
It can be difficult on all family members to have... Read More
Does music need to be "dumbed-down" for kids? The answer... Read More
Time management is an organisational concept traditionally associated with adults... Read More
A common theme over the past 20 years has been... Read More
Sex has a lot to answer for ? babies usually... Read More
A certain educator was once asked at what point should... Read More
One of the basic issues we need to understand is... Read More
Spending quality time with your children doesn't need to cost... Read More
Bearers of life, wipers of noses, givers of unconditional love... Read More
Back to school preparations are in full-swing. Soon, the first... Read More
Non-compliance is the family therapist's big word for your child... Read More
Why are more people, especially parents not outraged?I call it... Read More
Last night Tom's daughter, Sue, came out of her room... Read More
Family decision-making is an intriguing phenomenon. Many factors become part... Read More
Many people consider plush toys great for children. They say... Read More
Recently I took my two children to a popular new... Read More
Not so long ago a dad-to-be would pace up and... Read More
Something happened the other day that made me feel uneasy.... Read More
O.K. I've heard it a hundred times from my prison... Read More
More and more parents are expressing their concerns about how... Read More
Perhaps I could make a lot of money by founding... Read More
We all wish that our children should not smoke or... Read More
Q. With the school year just beginning, what can we... Read More
Voices!So many voices crying out for adherence and so many... Read More
Parenting |