MYTH: All teens have to rebel, and the teen years will be miserable years for a family.
REALITY: Teens do have to separate from their parents and families. That's good - otherwise kids would be living at home when they are 35.
They do, however, have to earn the privilege of being in charge.
MYTH: Once teens rebel, you have lost them forever.
REALITY: This is the fear of every parent, but it doesn't happen in most cases. As the proverb says, "Raise up a child in the way they should go, and when they are old they will not depart from it."
Two very important factors are implied here:
1) At some point, it is likely they could "depart" from what you have taught, and
2) they will come back to it.
This notion is elaborated on in Miller Newton's book "Adolescence: Surviving the Perilous Journey." Miller calls this notion Withdrawal - Isolation - Re-emergence. His view is that all adolescents withdraw, and some will go so far as to isolate themselves. They will, however, re-emerge at some point. Part of the parents' job then is to maintain the connection so a relationship can exist when they re-emerge.
MYTH: Raising teens is easy if you do it right.
REALITY: If you listen to some so-called parenting experts, raising kids - even teens - is a walk in the park.
According to them, the only reason you are having difficulty is because you are doing it wrong (not like them, in other words).
The reality is that parenting is a labor-intensive task. In order to raise kids and teach moral character, you have to go against the prevailing culture.
MYTH: Your teen years were just like those of your teen-ager.
REALITY: Many of the character issues they are dealing with are very much like the ones you faced. But the world, atmosphere and culture in which they are dealing with these issues is incredibly different. Don't make the mistake of thinking it's all the same.
Leading parenting expert Jeff Herring is a teen and family therapist, parenting coach, speaker and syndicated parenting and relationship columnist. Jeff invites you to visit parentingyourteenager.com for 100's of tips and tools for parenting through the teenage years. You can also subscribe to his free weekly internet newsletter "ParentingYourTeenager."
best cleaning company Lincolnshire ..Look around: Your kids are counting sleeps until the last... Read More
Have you ever sat and watch a child struggle with... Read More
"Will my doubts and fears affect my child?" This father... Read More
When my oldest boy was really young, he tickled my... Read More
Every children in the world whishes to have toys and... Read More
There isn't a school day that goes by that I... Read More
In our last issue we posted some of our suggested... Read More
Emotional OverloadMany single parents say they deal with a variety... Read More
Are you being smart about water conservation? Do you consider... Read More
First there were Yuppies (Young Urban Professionals). Then came the... Read More
Moms, did you ever question your value as a role... Read More
Child Party Planning Guideline #1)Pick the ThemeYour child is going... Read More
Parents of teenagers frequently ask what can be done to... Read More
Giving advice to a teenager is very easy; getting a... Read More
One of the most important aspects of parenting, is ensuring... Read More
You have a chore to do around the house, and... Read More
Research literature, recent books, and common sense, all point to... Read More
Dear Vijay,I worry about not being a good parent. My... Read More
Most of us really don't like it when someone is... Read More
Meningitis is an inflammation of the membranes around the brain... Read More
One of the few decisions you'll make during pregnancy that... Read More
If your parenting methods include abuse of any kind; physical,... Read More
We all wish that our children should not smoke or... Read More
Is your babysitter watching the kids and your k9 family... Read More
When a child wets the bed they worry. Children tend... Read More
on demand house cleaning Lake Forest ..A common theme over the past 20 years has been... Read More
It happens every year. Just when you are settled in... Read More
Most of us recognize the continuing escalation of violence around... Read More
Many of us have grown up drinking caffeinated diet sodas... Read More
All children will likely have many different health problems during... Read More
Public-school teaching is structured in such a way that it... Read More
Much has been said about the "gifted child" but in... Read More
Successful families don't just happen. They take time, talent and... Read More
If you spend any time in the parenting section of... Read More
Why Is Spending Time with Your Child So Important?For children... Read More
Although it might seem pretty corny to a lot of... Read More
Sometime the most effective training tool in rapidly accelerating the... Read More
1 "Law of Belonging": The greatest need of teenagers (after... Read More
A study done by the Thomas B. Fordham Institute found... Read More
Teri was 5. As younger siblings do, she looked up... Read More
You can learn a lot from children.The best part of... Read More
Many research studies have shown the overall effectiveness of stimulant... Read More
This can be a very complicated issue, so I don't... Read More
Life is comprised of pieces of time sprinkled with pivotal... Read More
Child care costs are are one of the most expensive... Read More
Annie easily slipped into becoming the sole caregiver of her... Read More
The Flow of WaterWater is essential for life on the... Read More
Giving advice to a teenager is very easy; getting a... Read More
Although many parents are concerned with our children's intelligence quotient... Read More
How excited do kids get with the start of school... Read More
Parenting |