Just the other day my oldest son asked:
"Daddy, am I old enough to call you Dad?"
Won't be long now before he is asking for the car keys.......
Here are a few things I'm learning as well as some important things I've discovered so far about this thing called fathering.
1. You really have to give up the myth of quality time vs quantity time. By the time the average child is 7 years old, they have watched 20,000 commercials. Given that amount of influence, infrequent "quality time" just doesn't cut it. It has to be quantity time that's of high quality.
2. As a dad you have been influenced and effected by the generations of fathering that went on before you. By the same token, the fathering we do will not effect only the children in our home. The job we do as fathers, for better or worse, will effect generations to come.
3. Sue Shellenbarer, a columnist for The Wall Street Journal has coined the phrase the "tomorrow trap." She describes the tomorrow trap as "living for the future, taking refuge in visions of a relaxed and rewarding personal and family life somewhere down the road.....a kind of mirage that people chase while in reality they are burying themselves in work and other pursuits."
Ouch. Sounds familiar to me, how about you? As dads we have to remember that not only does "someday" never come, it's not even on the calendar. Spend the savored time now, because today is here.
4. Some of us may not have had the best model for a dad in our own father, or perhaps no model at all. That's sad and painful. What it is not is an excuse. It can be a springboard for change. Whatever has been handed down to us, we can decide to change in this generation. There is so much information available now on how to do this dad thing.
5. Just he other day a father asked me "how do I play with my little kids." While it's sad that the question has to be asked, the answer is really quite simple. Get down on the floor with them, and let them lead. You follow.
6. "Daddy's home!" are two of the best words in the English language.
Visit secretsofgreatrelationships.com for tips and tools for creating and growing a great relationship. You can also subscribe to our f*r*e*e 10 day e-program on how to enrich your relationship today, from relationship coach and expert Jeff Herring.
personalized cleaning services Des Plaines ..Identity and Your Fraternal TwinFor the most part, throughout this... Read More
We are all so very happy to see that the... Read More
While most fathers aspire to become the best Dads they... Read More
Q. I need your help with a question about my... Read More
As our children grow, they will be going to schools... Read More
Not so long ago a dad-to-be would pace up and... Read More
Perhaps I could make a lot of money by founding... Read More
Can you draw a straight line? Most adults don't consider... Read More
I was reading "A Modern Infant Armada", a humor column... Read More
I really like all natural remedy for Attention Deficit Disorder... Read More
A tall, weary-looking mother with glasses, walked into my counseling... Read More
Single parenting has seemingly become an acceptable norm which is... Read More
Have you ever had this struggle with your teens? Did... Read More
'Picky Eater' is a label coined to describe the phenomenon... Read More
When my daughter was born, I must admit there was... Read More
You can learn a lot from children.The best part of... Read More
Are you a parent concerned about passing values on to... Read More
Question 1 "How do I get more time to play?"... Read More
An estimated five million scooters will be sold this year... Read More
In our last issue we posted some of our suggested... Read More
Nothing touches the heartstrings of a parent or teacher more... Read More
Q. Things have been relatively calm and OK with our... Read More
Dear Sir, It was with some interest that I read... Read More
Often I have heard that leaders are born, not made.... Read More
The human brain never actually stops developing. Beginning formation in... Read More
family-safe home cleaners Arlington Heights ..In speaking with parents a comment I frequently hear is... Read More
There's a new kind of fun and calm out there... Read More
"No thank you. Don't bother to send me the report... Read More
MYTH: If you have not parented as well as you... Read More
A certain educator was once asked at what point should... Read More
Home, home on the range, Where never is heard A... Read More
It happens every year. Just when you are settled in... Read More
Many families do not want to believe their child is... Read More
You are in the final round of your favorite game... Read More
Bi-Polar Disorder, or Manic Depression, is characterized by mood swings,... Read More
Direct Answers - Column for the week of May 31,... Read More
Every now and then I'll get a story sent to... Read More
The snow was getting heavier with each lift of the... Read More
Public-school teaching is structured in such a way that it... Read More
The advances in science over the past century have been... Read More
It is so important to create an environment that promotes... Read More
Julia Roberts recently gave birth to twins: Hazel and Phinnaeus.... Read More
One of my first memories of childhood is that of... Read More
A tall, weary-looking mother with glasses, walked into my counseling... Read More
She slipped her small, soft eight-year-old hand into mine. Her... Read More
Wooden toys are one of the best alternatives for the... Read More
Voices!So many voices crying out for adherence and so many... Read More
In the last few years, parents started getting more and... Read More
Reasearch into children's friendships shows that those children who are... Read More
Plus size children and overweight children need patterns and clothing... Read More
Parenting |