Just the other day my oldest son asked:
"Daddy, am I old enough to call you Dad?"
Won't be long now before he is asking for the car keys.......
Here are a few things I'm learning as well as some important things I've discovered so far about this thing called fathering.
1. You really have to give up the myth of quality time vs quantity time. By the time the average child is 7 years old, they have watched 20,000 commercials. Given that amount of influence, infrequent "quality time" just doesn't cut it. It has to be quantity time that's of high quality.
2. As a dad you have been influenced and effected by the generations of fathering that went on before you. By the same token, the fathering we do will not effect only the children in our home. The job we do as fathers, for better or worse, will effect generations to come.
3. Sue Shellenbarer, a columnist for The Wall Street Journal has coined the phrase the "tomorrow trap." She describes the tomorrow trap as "living for the future, taking refuge in visions of a relaxed and rewarding personal and family life somewhere down the road.....a kind of mirage that people chase while in reality they are burying themselves in work and other pursuits."
Ouch. Sounds familiar to me, how about you? As dads we have to remember that not only does "someday" never come, it's not even on the calendar. Spend the savored time now, because today is here.
4. Some of us may not have had the best model for a dad in our own father, or perhaps no model at all. That's sad and painful. What it is not is an excuse. It can be a springboard for change. Whatever has been handed down to us, we can decide to change in this generation. There is so much information available now on how to do this dad thing.
5. Just he other day a father asked me "how do I play with my little kids." While it's sad that the question has to be asked, the answer is really quite simple. Get down on the floor with them, and let them lead. You follow.
6. "Daddy's home!" are two of the best words in the English language.
Visit secretsofgreatrelationships.com for tips and tools for creating and growing a great relationship. You can also subscribe to our f*r*e*e 10 day e-program on how to enrich your relationship today, from relationship coach and expert Jeff Herring.
tidy up service Glenview ..I am crying tears of joy mixed with great sadness... Read More
It was blisteringly hot last Saturday. As I took that... Read More
Many young people don't know how to study efficiently and... Read More
The internet is a dangerous place for your children. Don't... Read More
We take it for granted that children know how money... Read More
Summer Survival The... Read More
You send your child to school and the teachers teach... Read More
There's a phrase that's become popular over the past few... Read More
"Do not think that love, in order to be genuine,... Read More
The brightly colored plastic mobile dangles lazily overhead in the... Read More
Spending quality time with your children doesn't need to cost... Read More
Everyone loves penguins. And now, everyone has a chance to... Read More
Q. Things have been relatively calm and OK with our... Read More
How do we deal with our seriously distressed children and... Read More
Giving with a happy heart. If you teach a child... Read More
In the last 20 years we've all been introduced to... Read More
On a recent Saturday evening, I noticed a young teen-age... Read More
Courage means doing the right thing when it is hard,... Read More
There are a lot of sophisticated parenting theories and techniques... Read More
There are only two ways to get more money:1) Increase... Read More
One of parents' most important duties is to protect their... Read More
As thinking, acting human beings we have the ability to... Read More
What's hard for teenagersHaving people who don't understand you trying... Read More
One reason public schools get away with educational failure, year... Read More
The Greatest Gifts in Life, which are always created for... Read More
maid service near Winnetka ..Becoming a stepmother can undoubtedly be one of the most... Read More
"It takes a village to raise a child" is more... Read More
Compulsory attendance laws are school authorities' first assault on parental... Read More
My name is Duncan and I'm 2 years old. I... Read More
In theory, working at home is an ideal situation. But... Read More
As I sit here and reflect on the past two... Read More
One of the implications of the current trend toward smaller... Read More
In June, elementary school children across North America cheered as... Read More
Adderall is a stimulant medication used in the treatment of... Read More
Teaching kids to deal with conflict effectively and peacefully is... Read More
Family meetings provide opportunities for feelings to be aired and... Read More
Most of us can agree that there is a lack... Read More
Q. When you consult with a family with teens, what... Read More
As part of the whole-language (or "balanced") reading-instruction philosophy, many... Read More
If You're Having Twins..is it double the headache, or double... Read More
My wife and I have been working on a video... Read More
Pool safety should be on the minds of every parent... Read More
One reason public schools get away with educational failure, year... Read More
Information is gold when you are adopted. Every tiny piece... Read More
As the flurry of Back to School activities subside, parents... Read More
What parents of a teen haven't wondered where their sweet... Read More
When parents help their children learn to read, they help... Read More
The small, lilac colored hexagonal box, with Winnie the Pooh... Read More
It is human nature to feel competitive and envious toward... Read More
The main thing we noticed since having a baby is... Read More
Parenting |