Not Letting Them Think.
We all implicitly know that anything questioning the process of cognition itself will be met with massive irritation, making us want to respond with "Don't question my capacity to think." Their moronic reasoning to show how logic is derived, provokes the thought, "Don't try to tell me how to think." Forcing their opinions down your throat earns the response, "Don't tell me what to think." Some parents show no respect for personal boundaries long after childhood, straightening your clothes, your hair, invading your privacy-incessantly buzzing around you like a mosquito. This belittlement implies incompetent dependency-a fundamental insult to Man or animal-any way you slice it. These actions tick everyone off, at any stage in life.
Their children are a test bed for ill technology-the grand experiment-saying "In this child, the great dream will be made real," and they hold them to their own irrational standard of how they wish life to be. They experiment with violence, as if forcing kids to practice the senseless can make it succeed, and then take aggression out on them when it fails. They trounce on their children's right to life by their gift of life. They punish them for having preferences. They force them into unchosen activities, pushing them into unnecessary competition in areas they care or don't care for, straining kid's friendships and taking the joy out of everything. Eventually their children accept patterns of repression, whose unchosen and unhappy situations follows them into adulthood.
Breaking life down into philosophic essentials, the motives that drive ideas and actions either go on one side-the side of life, or on the other-the side of death. Maybe five percent of parents I have known had a conscious understanding of intellectual essentials and could convey them effectively to children. Thinking is exactly what they don't know how to explain or train. Most wouldn't want to harm children if they knew better, but often they don't and at some point they made the choice not to know. That is their guilt. The crucial point is that their actions affect the child positively or negatively according to existential cause and effect, regardless of their claimed intentions. So what do they do? They try to live their lives for them. They buzz in their face like an insect and never leave them alone, saying "Why do you have to do it my way? Because, that's why. Do you want to be grounded? Don't question me." They offer no chain, make no attempt to teach one and penalize children for reasoning through what doesn't make sense to them. Riddled with cognitive errors and brimming with inexperience, they'll refuse to spank their child as a moral stand when pleasure and pain are the first rudimentary connections a child can make, and their children never learn to respect social boundaries. Instead they'll attempt to explain the ramifications of being good or bad when it's still well outside their cognitive range. Some hit unjustly, choosing violence as the constant solution instead of responsibly engaging a child ready for more complex understandings. A smothering parent will choose their children's diet, their interests, their friends, their schedule, their career, their mate, you name it, claiming to care. They will be hated, and as the children grow, both will make each other miserable. When the kids leave, don't expect to see them for a long, long time.
There is no justification for our every action being checked by another. Alone, we can relax. We can try new things, test and entertain conclusions with no need for immediate validation. There are no disagreements to have and no justifications to clear with ourselves, only dysfunctions to identify and inefficiencies to overcome. Few things are more valuable than a safely executed mistake. There are questions in life that need not be answered on the spot. Experience with the cognitive process itself will provide the completed picture; kids must only remain free to exercise it. Parental interference is a confession that they don't understand the cognitive process themselves, and don't trust their children to use it either. It is inappropriate to attempt to raise another consciousness until you have mastered your own.
Copyright 2005 Ronald E Springer
Ronald E. Springer is the Author/Philosopher of Moral Armor, the world's first fully-integrated moral philosophy based on the nature of Man. Featured on The Mitch Albom Show, NBC and FOX News radio affiliates, Mr. Springer is available for interviews, speaking engagements, philosophy workshops and seminars. Please contact ronaldespringer@moralarmor.com or visit ronaldespringer@moralarmor.com for details.
best cleaning company Highland Park ..We begin forming healthy habits at a young age. With... Read More
As part of the whole-language (or "balanced") reading-instruction philosophy, many... Read More
IntroductionChildren are the gifts of God to parents. That young... Read More
1. New Word of the DayIntroduce your preschooler to a... Read More
Here's some of the bad news about sedentary lifestyles:? Forty... Read More
There are a few points about shyness in children which... Read More
If you were to ask 100 parents why they think... Read More
Dads, please let me encourage you to change some things... Read More
The initial state of happiness about an own child is... Read More
When was the last time you and your kids rolled... Read More
(Excerpted from Jim Rohn's 2004 Weekend Leadership Event)You have to... Read More
I am a single mother of a 17 year old... Read More
The biggest complaint you hear from parents about their children... Read More
I am in pain. I've been in pain all day.... Read More
I don't know how people raise daughters because I have... Read More
John Bishop's Goal Setting for Students.comParents ? Minimize Homework Hassles?It's... Read More
When David was nine and Laura was twelve, the battles... Read More
Non-compliance is the family therapist's big word for your child... Read More
I know as a single parent or even with 2... Read More
You send your child to school and the teachers teach... Read More
In our last issue we posted some of our suggested... Read More
On a bright Sunday morning, a couple of weeks ago,... Read More
Most of us can agree that there is a lack... Read More
Do you want to create a deeper, more loving relationship... Read More
Nanny 911 Interview with Montel WilliamsI saw an interview with... Read More
high-end home cleaning Winnetka ..Most of us can agree that there is a lack... Read More
Sometimes dreams really can come true! May 8th - 11th,... Read More
Mommy (Daddy), Why do those people want to hurt everyone?Last... Read More
For many years underparenting was perhaps the biggest problem facing... Read More
Younger generations unfortunately will not understand how larger than life... Read More
An apology is a sign of strength, not weakness. Sometimes... Read More
To the untrained eye, it might look like a piece... Read More
When your child shows signs of potty training readiness, it's... Read More
Not many things are more upsetting than discovering that your... Read More
Why do some children still do best after divorce and... Read More
Children explore the world around them and learn through pretend... Read More
An Awesome Dad in by no means perfect. But that... Read More
It has been a long day. Home from work, you... Read More
Home, home on the range, Where never is heard A... Read More
Grandparents, what better way to stay close to your grown... Read More
One of the implications of the current trend toward smaller... Read More
As a parent, you can learn a lot about your... Read More
The distressed adolescent often has feelings of abandonment, emotional detachment,... Read More
It happens every year. Just when you are settled in... Read More
Vouchers, which give tax money to parents to pay for... Read More
We all know that using cloth nappies is best for... Read More
If your child is to derive the benefits of physical... Read More
When parents help their children learn to read, they help... Read More
Dear Sir, It was with some interest that I read... Read More
'And all because of a damned cat! It's only a... Read More
Parenting |