I wanted to share with you one of the most valuable lessons my daughter taught me when she was sixteen-months-old. I call this essay, "Cherish Your Wood Chips."
Today was one of those days where I just couldn't get enough done. No matter how many times my pen scratched off a to-do list item - a new one seemed to appear. But you, Samantha, didn't have anything on your agenda.
At sixteen-months your days are usually quite free. I sat in my home office, routinely punching computer keys, and you came to my office gate. You had your coat, draped over your head, looking like a little green goblin.
"Samantha we can't go outside today. For one, it's cold and secondly I just have too much on my plate." One of your blue eyes peered out questioningly from beneath the green cape. You then walked to the door and pounded on it. I realized that working was futile - you wanted to go play.
I glanced at my watch, if we hurried we could be back in thirty-minutes, enough time to satiate your needs for the outside world without interfering with my needs on the inside world.
Together, hand in hand, we walked down to the park. I was ready to take you on your favorite swing. Instead, you plopped down in a pile of wood chips. I watched half in amazement and half in frustration as you scrutinized each one. Turning it. Tasting it. Feeling it.
I let out a sigh and situated myself on a low monkey bar. I don't have time for this, I thought. I didn't say the words - but Samantha, I had brought you here to swing. I had brought you here to play. And since you were just examining wood chips - I thought of the ways this time could be better spent. My to-do-list ran through my mind: change the laundry, answer e-mail, finish pre-pub issue, respond to Eric's galleys, finish Ken's marketing campaign, send kit to Scholastic.
I let out another sigh and was about to pick you up and take you home, when a little boy approached. I watched as you excitedly ran to him. You displayed each proud find - each beautiful wood chip.
The little boy smiled like it was a holiday as he accepted each offering. When your hands were empty, you ran back for more.
The boy continued to smile. He was with his grandmother - and while she paused for your sixty-second exchange, she then hustled him along saying, "We need to get on the swing so I can get back and finish dinner."
You watched the boy on the swing. It was like a silent communication. You knew, he too, would rather be playing with the wood chips.
After about ten minutes on the swing and a few glances at her watch, the grandmother caught the young boy and began the descent home. Your gaze followed him - and Samantha, you don't have a poker face - you were sad. You plopped back into the wood chips and began to pick them up again. One by one. You had no dinner to fix. You weren't even hungry. The only thing of importance were the wood chips and someone else who could understand their magnificence.
I was saddened a bit as I watched you there. Eventually you will have dinner to cook, you might have your own kids to take to the park, laundry to-do, or a boss to reckon with. Somewhere, somehow, you will learn the constraints of our world. But not today.
As I watched you, I realized I could be like the grandmother and pull you from the magic land of wood chips and take you back to the world of time and accountability. But in that instant, I knew I needed those wood chips too.
So I went down next to you. I on my back, in light colored clothes - immersed in a pile of wet, muddy wood chips; you in your jeans, kneeling, intently handing me each one.
We made the chips into a necklace. We built them into a tower. We stuck them down our shirts. We played catch with them. We pretended they were pizza. We imagined what they would say if they could speak. We smiled at them and pretended that they smiled back.
People mulled around the park, taking their dogs for ten-minute walks, skipping along on their thirty-minute jogs. I am sure they thought we were crazy.
When I next glanced at my watch, two hours had passed. We both had wood chips in our hair and mud on our clothes, but I don't think either of us has ever looked more beautiful.
You stood up, ready now, to go home. And I took your hand and we walked together.
When we got home - I took out a pen and paper and in big black lettering I wrote: "Cherish Your Wood Chips." I stuck it in my daily-planner, right across from my to-do list.
Samantha, when I woke up this morning, I didn't know you would hand me one of the secrets to happiness. When I awoke this morning, I did not understand the value of a wood chip.
Brook Noel is the author of The Change Your Life Challenge: A 70 Day Life Makeover Program for Women. Her unique program has helped thousands of women "makeover" all aspects of their lives. Learn more at http://www.changeyourlifechallenge.com
kitchen deep cleaning Deerfield ..Nothing touches the heartstrings of a parent or teacher more... Read More
Imagine yourself lying flat on your back, totally strapped down... Read More
Dan Rather made a significant and tactical error and got... Read More
Many parents seem to be more than a little confused... Read More
The law of -ing.The law of -ing refers to a... Read More
Successful parents have learned to be both firm and kind... Read More
Q: My husband and I are at a loss as... Read More
Beyond cases reported to authorities, little knowledge exists on the... Read More
Life is funny.My twenty-year-old daughter, Melanie, has a her new... Read More
A common problem many times facing parents is Colic. Estimates... Read More
School authorities often complain that classes are too large. They... Read More
It's a familiar scene: Kids screaming at each other, complaining... Read More
When you're a parent it's a difficult decision to know... Read More
10 Fun Things You Can Do With Your Children this... Read More
Rule #1 Make Every Bite Count!Everything your child eats should... Read More
At the ADHD Information Library we are big believers that... Read More
It was at that time when our marriage was falling... Read More
We know that ancient cultures and Indians and the like... Read More
There are moments in a parent's or grandparent's life, when... Read More
"He is happiest, be he king or peasant, who finds... Read More
Although, not a well publicized statistic, childhood obesity has more... Read More
The initial state of happiness about an own child is... Read More
I am a single mother of a 17 year old... Read More
"I WON'T DO IT!" "YOU CAN'T MAKE ME!"Whether parent or... Read More
It can be difficult on all family members to have... Read More
interior house cleaning Highland Park ..Be sure to respect the intellectual changes that mark adolescence.... Read More
The children of Baby Boomers, the Echo Generation, are entering... Read More
Nothing touches the heartstrings of a parent or teacher more... Read More
"There is nothing new under the sun," states Ecclesiastes 1:9.... Read More
From the book Spider's Night on the BoomI've only begun... Read More
As the new school year begins, parents play a pivotal... Read More
I remember when my daughter was born, later my son.... Read More
After giving up my profession to become a wife, a... Read More
How can two or three children in the same family... Read More
One reason public schools get away with educational failure, year... Read More
'I felt great until I walked into the classroom -... Read More
Grandparents, what better way to stay close to your grown... Read More
Dear Vijay,I worry about not being a good parent. My... Read More
The debate in many towns continues throughout this country about... Read More
It's a familiar scene: Kids screaming at each other, complaining... Read More
Drivers 16 years of age have little driving experience, putting... Read More
1. They are leaders as well as parents. They don't... Read More
How in the world do you get your child to... Read More
You know that children can get into trouble. The older... Read More
One of the basic issues we need to understand is... Read More
Is there a difference between lazy and unmotivated? Why do... Read More
There are so many learning labels floating around these days... Read More
You're trying to catch up on some sleep on a... Read More
If you spend any time in the parenting section of... Read More
Child support is defined as that part of your income... Read More
Parenting |