How to Set Healthy Limits at Work

Back in college, I wrote for a five-day-a-week, award-winning campus newpaper. My skills were growing and I was earning a reputation as a solid reporter.

I was miserable.

If I wasn't in class, I was out inverviewing sources or toiling in the newsroom. I missed seeing my friends at the dorm, got little sleep and swigged Maalox to get through the afternoons. And still my desk editor pressured me to be more productive.

Then an adult advisor gave me an insight I've never forgotten:

AN ORGANIZATION WILL TAKE AND TAKE AS LONG AS YOU KEEP GIVING. IF YOU WANT LIMITS ON WHAT YOU GIVE, YOU HAVE TO SET THEM.

This insight has come to my rescue over and over again. It didn't matter what the organization was: a place of employment, a faith community, a volunteer group. Setting healthy boundaries on what I gave was MY job, and no organization would do it for me.

Not that it's easy. Setting limits can be scary, especially when your job is at stake. Workplaces vary widely in their responses to employees' attempts to set limits.

"The cold, hard reality is that you can't always do that where you are," says Linda Koch, a recruiter for Flexible Resources, Inc., of Stamford, Connecticut.

Having a strong track record as a valuable and accommodating employee helps.

In addition, experts say, you might:

--Put your proposal in writing.

--Be specific about what you want your new schedule to look like.

--Think like your boss. Show how you will meet goals and handle emergencies when your new limits go into effect.

--Support your proposal with business reasons rather than your personal reasons.

--Anticipate objections.

--Give your boss plenty of time to review your proposal.

You could even offer your proposal as an "experiment," Koch suggests.

The good news is that technology is allowing workers to keep up productivity with less face time. Meanwhile, employers are gradually learning that allowing employees greater flexibility boosts motivation and loyalty.

Back in college, I didn't have any strategies for setting limits. I just pushed through my fear, marched up to my desk editor and said I was going to go home every day by 4 PM.

PERIOD.

That conversation took every ounce of my strength. To my amazement, though, the sky didn't fall! I was fortunate to be taught a lesson that guides me to this day.

Everyone needs healthy limits. If you're giving too much, take at least one small step today to establish the limits that work for you.

(c) 2004 Norma Schmidt, Coach, LLC

Norma Schmidt, Coach, LLC, specializes in helping women who are both professionals and parents to create balance. She offers teleclasses, workshops and individual and group coaching. Norma publishes "The Balance Point," a free e-zine, every other Friday. Visit http://www.normaschmidt.com

car service from Midway Burlington .. Lockport Chicago limo O’Hare
In The News:

Tech expert Kurt “CyberGuy" Knutsson says a malware app called SpyLend is posing as a financial tool, hitting 100,000-plus downloads.
Tech expert Kurt “CyberGuy" Knutsson says Clone Robotics’ Protoclone mimics humans with 1,000 muscles – too human for comfort.
Tech expert Kurt “CyberGuy" Knutsson urges you to use Apple’s App Privacy Report to see what your apps are really up to.
Tech expert Kurt “CyberGuy" Knutsson talks about how to smoothly transfer your data from an old laptop to a new one using cloud storage or external drives.
Kurt the CyberGuy offers tips to safeguard your personal information as scammers become more sophisticated with scam texts and other methods.
WeRide's unmanned electric delivery van, the Robovan W5, has 194 cubic feet of cargo space and can carry payloads up to about 2,205 pounds
Kurt the CyberGuy recommends deleting 16 browser extensions immediately in response to a report saying more than 3.2 million web users were affected by a security breach.
Stay up to date on the latest AI technology advancements and learn about the challenges and opportunities AI presents now and for the future.
A robotics firm in China claims a robot has performed the world's first humanoid robot front flip, which is significantly more difficult than a backflip.
A digital ID may be even more secure than a physical ID. Storing your driver's license in your Apple Wallet is an ideal solution for commuters.
A cybersecurity firm has shed some light on just how common tax scams have become. Kurt the CyberGuy offers his advice for how to protect your refund.
Lifesize Plans offers immersive walk-throughs that allow customers the opportunity to tour a home's design before construction actually begins.
Stay up to date on the latest AI technology advancements and learn about the challenges and opportunities AI presents now and for the future.
A man invested $4 million in bitcoin and lost it all with a single click when he was targeted by a vishing scam, which uses phone calls to trick people.
Expandable's Touchdown is a designer trailer that promises a luxury off-grid living experience and unfolds into a home in about 15 minutes.
Major employee screening company data breach affects 3.3 million people. Tech expert Kurt “CyberGuy" Knutsson explains what happened and gives five ways to protect your data.
Kurt “CyberGuy" Knutsson reveals mind-blowing tech that gives you sunlight on demand.
New malware "FrigidStealer" targets Mac computers. Tech expert Kurt “CyberGuy" Knutsson offers four ways to stay safe from infostealer malware.
Kurt “CyberGuy" Knutsson talks about how lab-grown muscles power a biohybrid hand for scalable prosthetics and research.
Reports of task scams have significantly risen in the past four years, according to the Federal Trade Commission. Kurt the CyberGuy offers some red flags.
iPhones have a hidden folder that eats up storage without you knowing it. Kurt the CyberGuy offers some tricks to free up storage on your device.
A recent ransomeware attack targeted Zacks, an American investment firm, and a cybercriminal claimed to have stolen records for millions of customers.
Stay up to date on the latest AI technology advancements and learn about the challenges and opportunities AI presents now and for the future.
Researchers unveiled a new soft prosthetic hand that combines the natural coordination patterns of our fingers with the decoding of motoneuron activity in the spinal column.
Accidentally deleting a text message on your iPhone or iPad is not a problem if you still need the message. Apple has a built-in way to recover it.

Parenting Your Teenager: 6 Tips for Dealing with Bad Report Cards

One of the basic issues we need to understand is... Read More

Kids and Sports: Fundamentals First

Would you hand a child calculus problems once she was... Read More

The Classic ADHD Child Reminds Me of Tigger

ADHD comes in differenty forms, or types. What... Read More

Discipline on My Mind

I look out of the window as I am writing... Read More

Helping Your Kids Handle Divorce

Every year over one million parents have to talk to... Read More

Are You Frustrated With Public Schools?

Join a growing number of parents and teachers!Fact: Last year,... Read More

Raising Strong Daughters

When my daughter was born, I must admit there was... Read More

Parenting Univeristy: Potty Training 101

When your child shows signs of potty training readiness, it's... Read More

Parenting Your Teenager: The Bottom Line Issues

Q. When you consult with a family with teens, what... Read More

Homeschooling --- A Superior Education For Your Child

Home-schooling provides children with a superior education. Parents can quickly... Read More

5 Ways To Help Your Kids Do Math

Uh oh.Your kids arrive home with their school reports and... Read More

Surviving As A Single Parent: Seven Simple Suggestions To Make Your Life Easier

1 - Forgive even if you will never be able... Read More

Frequently Asked Questions About Reading To Your Child

Are you worried about your child's reading habits? Perhaps you... Read More

Adoption: Laughter and Tears

If you ever walk through an orphanage, it will be... Read More

Top 20+ Reasons to Pay your Kid an Allowance

1. They can make mistakes under your guidance2. They will... Read More

A Quiz for Parents: What Are They REALLY Learning?

Picture this. Your child comes home with a special assignment... Read More

How to Teach Anger Management to Your Child

Most of us recognize the continuing escalation of violence around... Read More

Useful Jogger Stroller Accessories

There are many useful jogger stroller accessories out on the... Read More

Some Good News About Blended Families

They Spur Members To Grow EmotionallyTatiana Tannenbaum grappled with a... Read More

Watch Your Language! - How Parents Can Help Kids Help Themselves

'I felt great until I walked into the classroom -... Read More

THE NEW SCHOOL VISIT: 5 Things to Look For

Today the little red school house is not what it... Read More

Ritalin (Methylphenidate) in the Treatment of Attention Deficit Hyperactivity Disorder

Ritalin is a good medication with a bad reputation. Its... Read More

Teaching Respect And Values In Todays Society

The girl's jaw dropped in horror as the police officer... Read More

Parenting Your Teenager: 8 Things You Need to Be Doing

Get into their world. The world that teens are growing... Read More

Book Review: How to Get Your Child to Love Reading

How to Get Your Child to Love Reading was conceived... Read More

Granger limo Chicago ..