I was in the life insurance sales industry for over 8 years. One of best teaching that I have learned from the industry and found in all top sales professionals and successful individuals is:
"All super successful individuals love people more than they love money."
And it is their love for people that make them wealthy and rich.
I share this same teaching with my children since young. I truly believe that it will be the most important factors to help them become more successful in life.
Love refers to individual and personal caring that goes both beneath and beyond loyalty and respect. It includes the love for friends, neighbors and even adversaries. And most important of all, the lifelong commitment of love for the family.
We learn to love others by serving them and the love is unconditional. We may not always love those who serve us. Their love depending on how it is given, may spoilt us or intimidate us.
However unconditional, understanding and fully accepting love warms us without reservation and brings about our reciprocal love. We may not love those who serve us, but we definitely love those whom we serve.
I'd like to share the following tips where parents can give unconditional love to their children and giving them the opportunities to serve. They are also the things that I live by:
Clearly Separate Dissatisfaction With Behavior From Love of Child
Parents must always expect their children to make mistakes and occasionally demonstrate unacceptable behaviors despite many previous reminders.
When your child misbehave, it is your responsibility as parent to correct him. However at every instance of discipline, you need to reiterate that it is what the child did that you do not like and that your love for him cannot be altered by anything. Mentioned frequently to your children of all ages and back it up with a hug and physical affection.
Here is an example of what I did with my four-old-year daughter three weeks ago when she misbehaved in class by playing during lesson and not giving attention to what her teacher was teaching.
I reprimanded her. I said, "Ethel, I am really upset when you played with your friends in class while all of you are supposed to listen to what your teacher had to say. You are there in class to learn. Do you understand me?"
Her tears started to roll after a long pause. And I sternly continued "Dear, will you promise papa that you will pay attention in class and if your friends misbehave during lesson, you will be the leader by telling them to give respect and attention to your teacher while he is teaching?"
She nodded and more tears started to roll out from her eyes. After another long pause, she asked "Papa, will you still love me?"
I follow up by saying "Dear, papa is angry because of what you did. However I will always love you and as much as ever. Just promise me that you will be a good student in class and show respect to your teacher. Will you do that?"
She nodded and stood quietly, waiting for me to say more. Instead of continuing to reprimand her, I close the episode by saying "Come, let papa give you a hug."
She threw herself over me while tears continue to roll. From her eyes, I can tell that she knew that she was in the wrong and at the same, she felt a sense a security that her papa will always be there to love her, no matter what happen.
This event happened about three weeks ago from the time I am writing this. Since then, I have not hear any complain from the teacher. I hope our little girl will continue to be a good and attentive student in class.
Develop A Service Orientation
You and your children can learn collectively to love through serving. Serve in some kind of community projects where your family can help others who are in need. Look for charitable services that you can rendered as a family and that can involve your children. By serving others, you children will learn and appreciate the true meaning of love.
Taking Care of Younger Siblings
If you have children of 4-years-old and above, you can teach them love by giving them the privilege of helping and serving their younger siblings.
Call your older child a tutor and tell him that the younger child is a student. Tell the older one that he will have the opportunity of helping the little one in many ways. He can sit next to the child at meal time, helping him to cut the vegetable or meat into smaller piece and taking milk for him. He can also holds the hand of the younger one while traveling on the road. He can read bed time stories to the younger one or simply helping you to watch out for his siblings while you are having a quick shower.
Your older child will not only learn to love whom he serves but will have an added appreciation for you as his parent as he helps with things you usually do.
Show Physical Love
Parents should show their love openly and teach their children that overt affection and love is perfectly okay. Give hugs and kisses. Schooling children need to feel their parents' physical love just as much as when they are pre-schoolers. Give hugs to your children when they leave home for school, back home from outside, pop into bed etc - a sincere and fuzzy hug is appreciate by everyone. Be sure to tell your children verbally that you love them as well as providing your hugs.
Article by Alvin Poh, founder of Learning Champ, a parenting wesbite that provides information and resources to parents, who want to help their children develop the important skills and mind set for a brighter future -> http://www.alvinkh.per.sg/learningchamp
disinfecting cleaning services Winnetka ..Does this sound familiar? Have your kids not listened to... Read More
Do you remember how you first learned the alphabet? I... Read More
Reasearch into children's friendships shows that those children who are... Read More
When it's time to put your child into a daycare... Read More
School authorities continually claim that they want more parent cooperation... Read More
The great thing about children is they absorb knowledge like... Read More
Many working families choose a commercial or individual day care... Read More
Not too long ago my teenage daughter approached me with... Read More
Incest is sexual activity, ranging from fondling to intercourse, between... Read More
Courage means doing the right thing when it is hard,... Read More
"Family Matters" was the headline that caught my attention in... Read More
As parents, we want our children and teens to grow... Read More
Blink. That's all we did, blink, and summer is ending... Read More
There are only two ways to get more money:1) Increase... Read More
Have you ever sat and watch a child struggle with... Read More
The disquieting behavior of teenagers in the 21st century, is... Read More
One of the few decisions you'll make during pregnancy that... Read More
Do you praise your child when he fulfils a basic... Read More
Parents of teenagers frequently ask what can be done to... Read More
Every summer our daughter goes to summer camp. She looks... Read More
People always ask my wife and I: "How did you... Read More
How in the world do you get your child to... Read More
In the wonderment of childhood, it is easier for a... Read More
1. You reheated the same cup of coffee three times... Read More
As the kids go back to school, you can go... Read More
last minute cleaning help Highland Park ..For troubled teens who are struggling with drug abuse, depression... Read More
Although, not a well publicized statistic, childhood obesity has more... Read More
What would it be like to have a clone? What... Read More
I'll never forget my first lesson in a glider.I'd been... Read More
In June, elementary school children across North America cheered as... Read More
All children will likely have many different health problems during... Read More
A certain educator was once asked at what point should... Read More
Ever feel like you're out of the loop when it... Read More
As thinking, acting human beings we have the ability to... Read More
In the last 20 years we've all been introduced to... Read More
You have two kids who are 14 months apart. How... Read More
Think back to your own childhood. Chances are, some of... Read More
Being in a competitive world, the lowest qualification to secure... Read More
As a parent there are lots of things that you... Read More
Research literature, recent books, and common sense, all point to... Read More
Strattera came out around January of 2003, and is becoming... Read More
One of the most powerful tools that parents have for... Read More
1. You reheated the same cup of coffee three times... Read More
In a single dose of children's television, I was bombarded... Read More
The great thing about children is they absorb knowledge like... Read More
Sitting by her Pinocchio lamp, she smiled at me as... Read More
Did you know that the school system is only able... Read More
The wonderful adaptability of children in dealing with the challenges... Read More
"Hugging is healthy: it helps the body's immunity system, it... Read More
1. New Word of the DayIntroduce your preschooler to a... Read More
Parenting |