How Can I Teach My Child Respect?

A common theme over the past 20 years has been how much children have changed from when we were growing up in terms of how they show respect. I know that for the most part in the 1960's, anyone in a position of authority commanded respect which included parents, teachers, police officers, principals, bosses, coaches and anyone else we viewed in some way as a person in authority. We in fact were taught to "obey" and do as we were told; no questions asked. Many of those people did command respect but unfortunately many of them abused their position of power and felt they were licensed to say and do whatever they wanted simply by virtue of the position they held.

There are 3 components to respect; the respect you have for yourself, the respect you have for others and the respect you COMMAND of others. It is our job as parents to model and teach all three. Is it reasonable for us to command respect simply because we're a parent?

For our children to learn respect we first and foremost need to learn to show respect towards ourselves. How is that done? We show respect for ourselves but setting clear and concise boundaries, presenting ourselves to others in a way that says we respect who we are, honouring our gifts and talents and choosing to spend time with people that support and value who we are.

It's very difficult to command respect if we don't show respect towards others, including our children. How do we show our children that we respect them? Showing respect towards our children means respecting their privacy, saying "please" and "thank-you" in a way that they know we're genuine, accepting their likes and dislikes, showing respect for their style of learning, speaking to them in a tone that we would want to be spoken to, speaking to them at eye level and making a point not to demean them in public. It also means giving them our time when they need it and acknowledging their feelings.

Children need to witness us treating our partners, co-workers, service providers, neighbors and friends respectfully. One of the ways they learn to show respect towards others is by what they've experienced through us. How do we handle disagreements? How do we talk about others when they're not around? How do we address people? How do we respect people's individual rights? Children learn what they live.

By no means should we accept rudeness and disrespect from our children. We can always say: "When you can ask me in a more polite way, I'd be glad to help you." Children will often challenge us and say things to try and make us feel guilty so we'll change our mind. For the most part, it's wise to just not engage in any kind of power struggle just to prove that we're the boss. We can simply state our request and then walk away and resolve not to give in if we've decided that the issue is non negotiable. If on the other hand, your child has presented an argument that is worth considering, he/she deserves to be heard. It doesn't necessarily mean that we're going to change your mind but it may be that there is room for negotiation. If they've presented a good argument in a non-confrontational manner, they deserve to be acknowledged. We also have a right to impose a reasonable consequence if a child has displayed blatant disrespect. It clearly tells them that you won't accept the behavior.

Being able to challenge someone's opinion or point of view, I believe is healthy as long as it's not done in a way that undermines the other person's character. Do we want to raise children that never question authority even when it seems unreasonable, unfair or unethical?

Barbara Desmarais is a parenting and life coach who has worked with parents for over 16 years. She presents workshops and seminars as well as works with parents privately helping them to find solutions to their parenting challenges.

http://www.theparentingcoach.com
http://www.theparentingcoach.com
604-524-1783

efficient cleaning crew Northbrook ..
In The News:

Viral video shared by Elon Musk shows Tesla's Optimus humanoid robots performing tasks from cooking to construction, garnering over 58.5 million views on social media.
Chinese hackers used Anthropic's Claude AI to launch autonomous cyberattacks on 30 organizations worldwide, marking a major shift in cybersecurity threats.
Apple's new Sleep Score feature gives you a rating for your nightly rest quality. Learn how to set it up on your Apple Watch and iPhone today.
Essential phone settings to enable before losing your device, including Find My network, location services and security features for iPhone and Android.
The Fox News AI Newsletter gives readers the latest AI technology advancements, covering the challenges and opportunities AI presents.
Cybersecurity research shows weak passwords remain a major threat, with simple patterns and number sequences putting millions of accounts at risk.
New Android malware BankBot YNRK silences phones, steals banking data and drains crypto wallets automatically. Learn how this advanced threat works.
FDA approves first human trial for Paradromics' brain-computer interface that could restore speech for paralyzed patients through neural technology.
New phishing platform QRR targets Microsoft 365 users across 1,000 domains in 90 countries. Learn how to spot fake login pages and protect your accounts.
OpenTable now uses AI to track your dining habits and share insights with restaurants. Learn what data they collect and how to protect your privacy.
Google's discontinued Nest thermostats still secretly upload home data to company servers despite losing smart features, raising serious privacy concerns.
New Android malware NGate steals NFC payment codes in real-time, allowing criminals to withdraw cash from ATMs without your card. Learn protection tips.
DoorDash confirms data breach exposing customer names, emails, addresses after social engineering attack. Learn how to protect yourself from scams.
Concerned about Google's AI scanning your Gmail? Learn how to disable Gemini features that access your emails, Drive files and Chat messages for privacy.
Google warns Android users about dangerous fake VPN apps hiding malware that steals passwords, banking details and personal data from phones and tablets.
Apple's digital passport feature lets iPhone users breeze through TSA checkpoints this holiday season using Digital ID technology at 250+ airports.
A new phishing scam targets family photos with fake "Cloud Storage Full" alerts. Criminals steal credit card information through fake sites. Learn protection tips.
South Korean scientists create ultra-thin fabric muscles that turn clothes into robotic assistants, lifting 33 pounds while weighing under half an ounce.
Archer Aviation has acquired Hawthorne Airport for $126M to launch an LA air taxi network ahead of the 2028 Olympics, featuring AI-powered eVTOL operations and next-gen aviation tech.
Stay up to date on the latest AI technology advancements and learn about the challenges and opportunities AI presents now and for the future.
Fake AI apps disguised as "ChatGPT" and "DALLĀ·E" are flooding app stores with dangerous malware that steals data and monitors users without detection.
Fake buyers demand specific vehicle reports from unknown sites to steal credit card information from car sellers, but warning signs can help identify these scams before paying.
Android users can now manage apps across multiple devices more easily with Google Play Store's updated remote uninstall button in the latest update.
NASA's Perseverance rover discovers shiny metallic rock on Mars that could be a meteorite from an ancient asteroid, containing high levels of iron and nickel.
Holiday scams spike during Black Friday and Cyber Monday as criminals exploit your leaked personal data. Learn how to protect yourself from fake stores and phishing.

Advantages of Using a Board Certified Pediatrician

When a child is born, a new number is added... Read More

How to Create an Attitude of Cooperation

Having been a parent educator and a PBS consultant for... Read More

Math Facts - Try Some Fun Ways to Learn Them

Memorizing math facts is a necessary part of elementary school.... Read More

How Many Sex Offenders Live On Your Block?

For any parent, learning that a convicted sex offender lives... Read More

Celebrating Life with Children in September

Here are ten simple pleasures you can enjoy with your... Read More

When Your Chicks Leave the Nest

When my son was 18 (and had finished school), he... Read More

Invented Spelling --- Another Alice-in-Wonderland Public-School Theory

As part of the whole-language (or "balanced") reading-instruction philosophy, many... Read More

Child Education

The initial state of happiness about an own child is... Read More

Choosing Names For Twins

There are many reasons for treating your twins as individuals... Read More

Camps for Troubled Teens: Disciplines and Wilderness

Parents looking for a quick fix usually choose troubled teen... Read More

The Best Gifts Ever: Life Experiences Every Child Should Have

This past holiday season Canadians spent over $45 billion-with parents... Read More

Because Every Child Is A Born Genuis

Graphology for Child development.:- Graphology is the science of understanding... Read More

My Best Buddy

My son, Dakota is now 7 yrs old. He is... Read More

The Classic ADHD Child Reminds Me of Tigger

ADHD comes in differenty forms, or types. What... Read More

Its OK For Your Child To Be Bored - In Fact, Its Recommended!

NY -- Strange as it may sound, bordom promotes happier,... Read More

Psychological Effects of Child Abuse

Many children who suffer from the psychological effects of child... Read More

How Do Campers Protect Their Children?

Oh yes you have! Suddenly, "Where's Bobby?" You instantly realize... Read More

Real Monsters Under Your Bed

There may really be a real monster under your kid???s... Read More

Baby Name Meanings

Speaking as a Michael (a Hebrew name, meaning "Who is... Read More

Swing Sets and Outdoor Play Equipment- 5 Essential Tips Before You Buy

For first time parents choosing a swing set or outdoor... Read More

The Safest Stuffed Toys for the Kids on your Gift List

Although it's hard to say when the first stuffed dogs... Read More

Ultimate Airplane Themed Games & Activities for your Childs Birthday Party

Are you looking for the Ultimate Airplane Themed Party Games... Read More

Parents Complaints --- Arrogant Public Schools Turn a Deaf Ear

School authorities continually claim that they want more parent cooperation... Read More

Send the Kids Outside!

Think back to your own childhood. Chances are, some of... Read More

Parents of Teens: Do You Ever Ask WHY is she so MEAN to me?

Do you ever wonder what is behind the occasional nasty... Read More

cleaning lady near Wilmette ..