Home
>
Parenting
>
Getting Through to Your Teenager

Getting Through to Your Teenager

Have you ever watched your teenager make a mistake (that you've made yourself) after you've warned them at least a thousand times? Is there anything more frustrating as a parent?

Well, this is somewhat typical in most "normal" households across America. We (parents) screw up, tell our children about it, and what do they do? They go out and repeat the same mistake. It makes you question your own gene pool.

In actuality, the problem isn't with the teenager (at least not all of it), the problem is in our approach to teaching our teenager the lesson we want them to learn. In a sense, we act just as crazy sometimes; we teach them using the same strategies that didn't work a month or year ago. We should be asking ourselves, when will we learn from our past mistakes?

Here's a better approach that I've experimented with few times with my own students. It's a modified version of the Socratic method. You simply lead your teenager to a predetermined answer that they come up with on their own. That's it. I know it sounds easy, but it takes quite a bit of practice. Allow me to demonstrate.

A parent of one of my students confided in me that her son was hanging around a dangerous group of boys in the neighborhood. She believed his friends were possibly into drugs, gang violence, and other criminal activity. With no father figure in the home, she thought maybe I could "get through" to him.

I asked her, "What have you said to him?" She replied, "I've told him at least a hundred times that his friends are up to no good, and they're going to eventually get him into trouble and jeopardize his future." She continued, as she cried, "I told him that I made the same mistake when I was his age, and he didn't want to go through the pain I did. I just can't get him to listen."

A lot of us can relate to this mother's frustration. We want so much for our children to avoid the mistakes we made. We can't understand why they can't understand our concern, and we become frustrated and sometimes even angry.

Well, I agreed to meet with her son after class. But I decided to use a different approach. I figured the old approach wasn't working, so what did I have to lose? After a little small talk, I simply asked a couple of simple questions, "Who are your three closest friends?" After he gave their names (all part of the group his mom disliked), I asked him a second question, "If you died tonight, and you had children, would you want any of those friends raising your son or daughter?"

After an extremely long pause, I let him off the hook by saying, "You don't have to give me the answer, but I do want you to ask yourself another question. If you wouldn't let them raise your children in the future, then why are spending most of your time with them today?" That was the end of our discussion.

This little episode may or may not have put him on the right track, but it did one thing his mother was unable to do ? get through to him. He now had to make his own decision based on his own reality, not his mother or his teacher ? and then accept responsibility for the consequences of that decision.

And that's all you can really do for teenagers?get them to think for themselves. If you did a good job teaching your children in the early years, the growing process (including the mistakes) is a lot easier to accept.

The key to getting through to your teenager is to say less, and ask more in order to get them to do more thinking. The more you say, the less they'll think. And the less they think, the more mistakes they're inclined to make. So, take your own advice, learn from your past mistakes by adopting a new approach.

Dr. Joe Martin is an award-winning speaker, author, professor, and educational consultant and owner of New Teacher Success. Visit http://www.newteachersuccess.com today!

quick home cleaning Glenview ..

In The News:

FBI warns cybercriminals are stealing family photos from social media to create fake proof of life images in virtual kidnapping scams targeting victims.

Instagram's new 'Your Algorithm' tool lets you control your Reels feed in real time. The app now gives you power to customize what videos you see.

Major Marquis fintech breach exposes 400,000-plus Americans' data through unpatched SonicWall vulnerability, with Texas hardest hit at 354,000 affected.

Free up iPhone storage fast by clearing large photos and videos from Messages app. Simple steps for iOS users to delete attachments without losing chats.

Scammers are flooding inboxes with fake tracking alerts that mimic real carriers, exploiting the holiday rush to steal logins and personal data.

The Fox News AI Newsletter brings you the latest news on AI technology advancements and the challenges and opportunities AI presents now and for the future.

Texas family reunites with missing 11-year-old cat Grayson after 103 days using Petco Love Lost's AI photo matching technology and community help.

Tired of AI customer service loops? These insider tricks help you escape "frustration AI" and get real human help when you need it most for urgent issues.

Unlock richer audio from your streaming apps with simple tweaks to volume normalization, equalizer settings, and quality preferences for cleaner sound.

Scammers are sending fake Facebook settlement payout emails that mimic legitimate notices from the privacy settlement administrator to deceive users.

Holiday shopping scams surge as fake refund emails target distracted consumers during Black Friday and holiday seasons, costing Americans billions annually.

The AI-powered IRMO M1 exoskeleton features four modes, including turbo, eco, training and rest for hiking, running, cycling and sports with eight-hour battery life.

OpenAI announced upgrades for its ChatGPT Images platform on Tuesday, saying the program can now make more precise edits and produce images more quickly.

Chrome for Android now turns web articles into AI-powered podcast conversations. Get hands-free browsing with Google Gemini's natural audio summaries.

LastPass faces $1.6 million fine from U.K. regulators after 2022 data breach exposed 1.6 million users. Password manager failed proper security controls.

Petco disclosed a data breach exposing customer Social Security numbers, financial account details, and driver's license information due to a software error.

Baseball teams can now analyze complete swing mechanics in normal training environments using Theia's markerless AI system that processes standard high-speed footage.

Smart home hacking fears overblown? Expert reveals real cybersecurity risks and simple protection tips to keep your connected devices safe from hackers.

MIT develops needle-free glucose monitor using light technology. Revolutionary device could replace painful finger pricks for diabetes management.

The ClickFix campaign disguises malware as legitimate Windows updates, using steganography to hide shellcode in PNG files and bypass security detection systems.

Researchers from Osaka Metropolitan University designed a 21-foot dome that combines aquaculture and hydroponics to create a self-sustaining urban food system.

The Fox News AI Newsletter gives readers the latest AI technology advancements, covering the challenges and opportunities AI presents.

ChatGPT data breach exposes personal info of users through partner Mixpanel. OpenAI confirms names, emails compromised in security incident.

Android rolls out Emergency Live Video for 911 calls, letting dispatchers see real-time scenes during emergencies. Great for holiday travel safety.

Malicious Chrome and Edge extensions collected browsing history, keystrokes and personal data from millions of users before Google and Microsoft removed them.

Getting Through to Your Teenager

Parenting