Reasearch into children's friendships shows that those children who are able to form friendships when they start school are happier at school and also learn better.
More significantly, a positive beginning to friendships has long-term implications for social and indirectly academic success.
Developing and maintaining friendships is a dynamic process. Most children experience some type of rejection from their peers throughout childhood. One study found that even popular children were rejected about one quarter of the time when they approached children in school.
Most children recover from such rejection. They move on and form constructive, worthwhile relationships but some children need help.
The results of number of studies indicate that children can be taught friendships skills. The strategies are simple and revolve around teaching children a range of friendly behaviours such as: talking with others while playing, showing an interest in others, smiling, offering help and encouragement when needed, a willingness to share and learning how to enter a game or social situation. It is also useful to teach some children alternatives to fighting and arguing when there is disagreement and conflict within groups.
Gender impacts on the ability to make friends. Professor Miraca Gross from the University of NSW has found that girls are further advanced along the stages of friendship than boys. Her research also indicates that gifted children were further advanced along the continuum of friendship behaviours than their peers. They look for more intimate friendships at a far younger age than their peers. This challenges the perception that only gifted children have poor social skills ? it seems that they have a different concept of friendships than those around them.
Children form friendships inside and outside of school and their regular day settings. It has been noted by some researchers that children who appear to have no friends at school frequently have networks of friends outside school.
It seems that having friends outside school can be quite an insulating factor to teasing and bullying that can occur within the school gate.
Parents often become quite concerned about an apparent lack of friends that a child has compared to a sibling or a friend. One research project indicated that children on average have only two significant friendships at any one time. Anecdotal evidence suggests that seconds frequently have more friends than the elder siblings and only children prefer one-on-one friendships to group relationships.
Generally parents need to do little more than provide social situations for children to build and maintain friendships. Involvement in some activities (but not so many that a child's life is full), opportunities for visits to friend's homes and to have friends visit your home and some help making sense some of the less satisfactory social situations a child may encounter are the main fare for parents in this area.
However some coaching on how to make and keep friends may be desirable when children really do have difficulty making and keeping friends.
Michael Grose is The Parent Coach. For seventeen years he has been helping parents deal with the rigours of raising kids and survive!! For information about Michael's Parent Coaching programs or just some fine advice and ideas to help you raise confident kids and resilient teenagers visit http://www.parentingideas.com.au
Dowagiac prom limousines .. Lockport Chicago limo O’HareI look out of the window as I am writing... Read More
It is hard to believe that summer is coming to... Read More
Why are more people, especially parents not outraged?I call it... Read More
Your child's first year of school should be a fun... Read More
Did you know that the school system is only able... Read More
Oh Please, Don't Say Maybe!!!!Are you often a participant in... Read More
One of the basic issues we need to understand is... Read More
Nanny 911 Interview with Montel WilliamsI saw an interview with... Read More
Remember when cash was a tangible commodity in all of... Read More
Maryann is so focused she's blind. She's slipped over the... Read More
How are parents to know they are doing the right... Read More
In today's busy world, many parents have lost the art... Read More
Using 14 "at" Flashcards To Teach Reading:This exercise helps your... Read More
Self-reliance and potential are two very important values that I'd... Read More
It's among the top criticism wives have of their husbands:... Read More
1. They can make mistakes under your guidance2. They will... Read More
Does this sound familiar? Have your kids not listened to... Read More
There are only two ways to get more money:1) Increase... Read More
They Spur Members To Grow EmotionallyTatiana Tannenbaum grappled with a... Read More
Last night Tom's daughter, Sue, came out of her room... Read More
Early childhood educators have called play "children's work". Many parents... Read More
Sometimes a change of perspective can make a huge difference... Read More
Being a parent is a role that requires a large... Read More
"There is nothing new under the sun," states Ecclesiastes 1:9.... Read More
Join a growing number of parents and teachers!Fact: Last year,... Read More
shuttle from O'Hare Lake Villa ..Dear Sir, It was with some interest that I read... Read More
Creating and making special memories with your child is very... Read More
Is your babysitter watching the kids and your k9 family... Read More
No matter how old your children are, you have an... Read More
What parent hasn't gone into a son's or daughter's room... Read More
Isn't it ironic that a country whose constitution allows for... Read More
What parents of a teen haven't wondered where their sweet... Read More
There are a LOT of alternative treatments for sale out... Read More
Homework. It doesn't have to be a daily battle of... Read More
Every now and then I'll get a story sent to... Read More
So you're pregnant. Congratulations! Your life is about to change... Read More
Few things are more completely enjoyable than becoming a grandparent.... Read More
The law of -ing.The law of -ing refers to a... Read More
Q. Things have been relatively calm and OK with our... Read More
My kids just can't get enough of playing games with... Read More
In my opinion, these things matter...1. Enjoying childlike delights before... Read More
Bi-Polar Disorder, or Manic Depression, is characterized by mood swings,... Read More
O.K. I've heard it a hundred times from my prison... Read More
Do your children have a McChildhood? Do they experience the... Read More
Children bombard parents with many challenging behaviours. We are delighted... Read More
To protect children's self-esteem or deflect complaints by parents, many... Read More
"In general my children refuse to eat anything that hasn't... Read More
We're all familiar with the over-indulgent parent. But there's another... Read More
Software for parental control is a useful tool, if applied... Read More
Would you hand a child calculus problems once she was... Read More
Parenting |