Facing the Homeschool Super Mom

I know this Mom. She homeschools her 5 children, plus she tutors several other children that are dropped off at her house. AND she's a Pastor's wife. AND she's working on fixing up the fixer-upper they just moved into. Whenever I've been in her house, it's been immaculate. Her children all have perfect manners. They all seem to be way ahead of their grade level. She's definitely gotta be a Homeschool Super Mom.

You're probably thinking of someone like this too, right? Someone that made you think, "Man, my son isn't reading as well as hers." or "My house isn't as clean as hers." Or a million other things.

And you probably discovered her when you were new to homeschooling. When you were already feeling uncertain in your new endeavors. You were already putting high expectations on yourself. You were constantly analyzing to be sure you were doing everything right. And as a result, you tend to be a little over-sensitive about what other's are accomplishing around you without giving enough credit to yourself.

So, it's really important that you remember (as a new homeschooler or a seasoned one) these basic principles that we all so easily forget:

"The 4 Basic Principles That Conquer the 'Super-Moms' Syndrome"

Principle #1: We always see other's through glasses that make them larger than life. When I was a teenager, there was this lady in our church. Her hair and makeup was always perfect. She lived in a big, expensive home. She was very stylish and her kids were so cool. I always wanted to grow up and have that.

But I don't anymore.

I'd rather have my house that gets messy 5 minutes after it gets picked up, my hair that falls down into my eyes as I pick up my children, and my face that only gets makeup on Sunday. Why you may ask? Well, here's why. I'm happy. I love my family, and I wouldn't trade them for anything.

The lady I had idolized as a teen? She still has her perfect home and impeccable style. But, she has a marriage without love and children who are stuck up adults who ignore her totally.

I had seen her through glasses that made her larger than life. In the end, she's not any bigger or greater than me. In fact, she probably wishes that she had my life!

So, if you start to think about someone else who seems to have the life you want, STOP LOOKING! Instead, sit down and make a list of 100 good things in your life--from the air you breathe, to the heat in your home, to the kisses from your child. I guarantee that you'll feel better about yourself that you ever have before.

Principle #2: Everyone has their own unique gift. Everyone has their own unique ability and we tend to notice in other's the abilities that might be our "weak" ones.

For instance, if you think you're house is always messy, you'll seem to know all these people who have perfectly neat homes.

For an example from my life, I have a son who struggles with speech and it seems like every other parent within a 100 mile radius have children with perfect diction. But you know that's not the way it is. My son might not pronounce every phonic sound correctly--yet!--but he has so many other gifts that hardly make that one seem important.

For instance, no one notices his speech. They always comment, though, how loving he is. Just running up to people and giving them hugs. And he has fun no matter what he does. Can you believe one day I actually heard myself saying, "Ryan. Stop that. Not everything is supposed to be fun." I had to step back and slap myself. Then I said, "Never mind. Mommy was wrong. Have as much fun as you can." And I learned a lesson from that.

So, forget about what the homeschooled Jones' are doing. Discover your child's unique ability and relish in it and develop it and learn from it.

Right now, at the end of your list of 100 things that you're grateful for, list 10 wonderful qualities or abilities for yourself and each of your children. Work on acknowledging, praising, and being thankful for all of your gifts. And don't forget to thank God that you got the greatest kids ever born on this earth.

Principle #3: It doesn't matter what others think. I know, it seems easier said than done. But I guarantee that if you've actually taken the time to write down your list of 100 things that you're grateful for and 10 wonderful qualities of your child, that you won't care what other people think because you will know and appreciate what you have.

And, see, it really doesn't matter what other people think.

What matters is what's important to you. Your core values. Your beliefs. Your ethics. How do you want your children to be as adults? Hey, write it down right now. 5 things you want your child to be as an adult.

Okay, I'll do it right now too for Ryan who is 6 years old--but do yours before you read mine: A loving husband and father An honest, ethical entrepreneur Faithful in service to God Kind, thoughtful, and helpful to those less fortunate Thankful and content for what he can do and what he has Now, I'll bet that you had similar types of things. Not, "makes $1,000,000 by age 30" or "wins he Miss America contest".

Focus on developing and rearing your child to have those 5 qualities, and I'll guarantee that the fact that Mrs. Smith's daughter who is 2 years younger than yours is reading book three times as difficult. Geez, that's a real life skill. You see what I'm getting at?

Principle #4: When you say "yes" to one thing, you are always saying "no" to something else. Have you ever heard that before? I heard that from an owner of a successful multi-million dollar business. That was the simple rule that he used to prioritize his life. When he sat at his desk with phone messages to return, he would literally think, "If I say 'yes' to calling this person, what will I be saying 'no' to?" When someone would asked to do something, he was able to say "no", knowing that if he said "yes" to that project, that he would be saying "no" to extra time with his family.

This principle applies to everyone whether they are conscious of it or not.

Mrs. Smith who is working so hard to have her child advanced in reading is saying "no" to some other educational area. Or, Suzie Homeschool Super Mom up the street who has her immaculate home is saying "no" to time with her kids or family or something else.

The same applies to me. I've said "yes" to this homeschool site, so I've had to say "no" to things like having a perfectly neat house, laundry always done and put away, and a 5 course home-cooked meal on the table by 5:00 every night.

Only say "yes" to the things that are important to you. (See, you don't know it, but I've been gone for 20 minutes. My daughter came downstairs crying, and I stopped to take care of her. And I've also acquired a set of ear muffs made from pipecleaners and pom-poms.) So, as I was saying, say "yes" ONLY to the things that are most important to you. And know ahead of time what you'll be saying "no" to before you say "yes"!

Principle #5: Take advantage of every possible tool. That's right. I don't lift a finger (well, hardly a finger) to clean my home as I have cleaner's come twice a week to take care of that responsibility for me. And to solve my meal preparation dilemma? I purchase items that can be thrown in the oven and get side dishes that are quick and easy.

You can do similar things. I have a homeschooling friend who takes one day a month and cooks all day to makes meals for 30 days that she freezes and uses one at a time. And I thought she cooked from scratch every night!

Having difficulties organizing? Don't fight it. Buy something that organizes your stuff or forget it. It really isn't that important to waste time stressing over!

Use all the tools you can, and leave everything else to collect dust.

So whatever happened to that super mom?

Hopefully by now you've done the exercises or at least skimmed enough here and there to know that there is no super mom except the unrealistic giant you've created in your mind. Instead, you should have a full, realistic view of the gifts and treasures that you possess and a new appreciation for all you get done and how you can enjoy doing what you do a little more! If you've done that, than I wasn't wrong in saying "yes" to this project!

Release your worries and enjoy life!

About The Author

Laura Bankston is author of Internationally selling Cooking with Kids Curriculum: Homeschool Cooking in a Box and the Homeschool Cookbook. She currently home schools her three children, maintains home school support websites, and manages their family-owned service business. For information on her curriculum and free home school support services, please visit http://www.homeschoolcookbook.com

http://www.homeschoolcookbook.com

Wood Dale Chicago prom limo .. Lockport Chicago limo O’Hare
In The News:

Stay up to date on the latest AI technology advancements and learn about the challenges and opportunities AI presents
Internet browsers are useful, but they can be dangerous. Clicking on malicious links can direct you to dangerous websites that steal information or infect your device.
Apple's latest iOS update introduces advanced artificial intelligence capabilities, which may be capturing and analyzing sensitive information.
Breach site confirmed 56,904,909 Hot Topic users' data leaked online. Tech expert Kurt “CyberGuy" Knutsson says the company's silence makes matters even worse.
Tech expert Kurt “CyberGuy" Knutsson discusses how an innovative Easy-Way kit turns standard strollers electric, simplifying navigation for parents.
Tech expert Kurt “CyberGuy" Knutsson talks about T-Mobile being hacked in broad cyberattack on global phone and internet companies.
Tech expert Kurt “CyberGuy" Knutsson shows you how to add, customize and manage widgets for quick access to apps and info from your iPhone home screen.
Wrong Google searches can not only compromise your device and personal data. They can also bring law enforcement to your doorstep. Hackers are targeting Google searches.
China's Shanghai Kepler Robotics has developed a new humanoid robot that can carry up to 35 pounds per hand for commercial applications across various industries
Checking your hearing has gotten easier with the new hearing test feature in AirPods Pro 2. You can take reliable hearing tests using your iPhone or iPad.
Stay up to date on the latest AI technology advancements and learn about the challenges and opportunities AI presents now and for the future.
Kurt "CyberGuy" Knutsson explains how a VPN — virtual private network — works and how running it can slow down the operation of your device.
The WalkON Suit F1, an exoskeleton developed to help people with disabilities, can actually walk over to a person in a wheelchair, solving a major problem.
ClickFix, a new scam targeting computer users, is on the rise in the U.S. The scam prompts its targets to click on a link to fix a problem.
Skydweller is the world's largest unmanned solar-powered aircraft that can stay airborne for weeks, and even months, without refueling.
The U.S. government said it is investigating after People's Republic of China hackers targeted commercial telecommunications service providers in the U.S.
Stay up to date on the latest AI technology advancements and learn about the challenges and opportunities AI presents now and for the future.
Scammers are using increasingly sophisticated ways to lure unsuspecting victims, and some are impersonating an email help desk or support team.
You can unsend or edit your iMessages with the latest iOS updates. Kurt the CyberGuy explains how you can save yourself some potential embarrassment.
Kurt “CyberGuy" Knutsson says there’s been a rise in cybercriminal services using hacked police and government emails to send subpoenas and data requests to U.S. companies.
Kurt “CyberGuy" Knutsson discusses how Axiom Space and luxury designer Prada are collaborating on NASA's Artemis III spacesuit design.
Voice assistants may cause confusion across devices. Tech expert Kurt “CyberGuy" Knutsson offers some solutions to fix it.
Shameless scammers trick veterans into giving personal info or cash. Tech expert Kurt “CyberGuy" Knutsson explores five common scams.
Tech expert Kurt “CyberGuy" Knutsson helps you honor our heroes with these powerful podcasts, audiobooks and documentaries this Veterans Day.

Drinking and Driving: Will Your Child Become a Statistic?

Just two days ago, another 15-year old child was added... Read More

Watering Your Young Child?s Mind

Mary, Mary, quite contrary, How does your garden grow? With... Read More

Pick Your Fights With Your Teenager Wisely

I know as a single parent or even with 2... Read More

Top 10 Things To Never Believe From Your Teenager

1) It's not my (pot, beer, cigarettes, etc.), I'm just... Read More

Mothers Day Tribute

As Mother's Day approaches I would like to give a... Read More

Busy Moms, Dont Forget to Take Time Out for You!

As mothers, we play so many different roles and most... Read More

Using Cloth Nappies

We all know that using cloth nappies is best for... Read More

Finding Answers to Underachievement

Finding answers to a child's underachievement is often a difficult... Read More

Ultimate Airplane Themed Games & Activities for your Childs Birthday Party

Are you looking for the Ultimate Airplane Themed Party Games... Read More

The Theme from MASH - Suicide is Not Painless

The Theme from MASHI flipped the button on the remote... Read More

Advocating for Your Child with LD

Advocate: you've probably heard the term before. But what does... Read More

How Effective Is EEG Neurofeedback Training in Treating the Symptoms of ADHD?

Many research studies have shown the overall effectiveness of stimulant... Read More

Getting through the School Daze

It's back to school time again. Does the thought of... Read More

Parenting

This article on parenting is by a practicing relationship counsellor/therapist,... Read More

How Kids Learn To Cooperate In Video Games -- A Guide for Parents and Teachers

A great many parents are concerned that the electronic games... Read More

Parental Involvement in Learning

Whether children attend public or private schools, they benefit when... Read More

Uniforms

Direct Answers - Column for the week of May 31,... Read More

Top 50 Father Quotations

"The greatest gift I ever had Came from God, and... Read More

Winning The Whining War

Jason Meridith's two-year old son whines when he wants more... Read More

Parenting Your Teenager: 6 Things to Stop Doing Right Away

1. STOP focusing on what you are going to make... Read More

Develop Your Childs Genius: Improving Concentration and Focus

Some people can concentrate on an assignment, to the exclusion... Read More

Assume Personal Responsibility? Who, Me?

As thinking, acting human beings we have the ability to... Read More

Guide to Choosing LEGO Toys for Children

If you're looking for toys that are both fun to... Read More

10 Reasons Why You Need to Ditch the Super Mom Syndrome

For any of you Moms out there that are doing... Read More

Water! Water Everywhere!

What one word best sums up summer fun? Water. I... Read More

Antigo wedding limo ..