Several similar terms describe the central attribute of a character that decides on the strength of personality and the degree of inner freedom:
- "self assurance" describes mostly the behaviour. Counterparts are insecure behaviour or shyness.
- "self confidence" is the mental and emotional state that causes the outer appearance.
- "charisma" is the effect that those have on others.
Self confidence doesn't mean being perfect or presenting oneself in a perfect way, but realizing and accepting own strengths and weaknesses, using strengths to reach aims and considering weaknesses as challenges, not insurmountable limits.
It can be observed that some children are by nature more actively exploring their environment than others. So possibly self confidence has a genetic foundation.
Still, all experiences that include social interaction, with parents, relatives, friends and classmates, influence the development of self esteem. Appreciation has a positive, rejection a negative effect. But unfortunately, it's not that easy.
False or fake appreciation can often be observed with parents and relatives. For example the adoration of even the smallest output of infant creativity, like crude drawings, and other approvals of a child's intelligence and appearance can lead to a situation of over-confidence. Undeserved rejection, on the other hand, like punishing or disregarding a child out of an own bad mood, will confuse it and create insecurity.
Over-confidence, or the belief in own abilities and performance that are not real, can lead to arrogance. This can either turn into insecurity, if the person later realizes the truth, or it turns into an inconsiderate behaviour, which also isn't making life easier. Insecurity or shyness are very common burdens and they tend to create a lot of problems. Aside from lacking social and personal success, the constant fear of the own inferiority creates barriers that are hard to overcome.
So what's the secret of how to give a child a healthy self-confidence?
- Be realistic with appreciation. If you feel you should commend your child for something, consider what would be the ability at its age and then evaluate the outcome. If it deserves appreciation, give it. If you have the feeling that your child is putting to much effort in getting your attention, try to get it back down to reality carefully. Love and appreciation shouldn't be goods that can be bought.
- Don't criticize or reject your child out of a bad mood. If you come home after a stressful day and your kid comes up with a picture, show some interest - it might mean a lot more to it than you think.
- Keep an eye on the influence your child is receiving from its friends. But if you have a bad feeling, try to talk to your child before you call the offender's parents and ask for a restraining order.
- Don't do things for your child if it's afraid of something. It might be hard sometimes, but how should it learn to be independent if it can always hide behind its parents? Later on, it will lack the confidence that comes from the experience of having to do things on its own.
- Always be there to give advice if required. There's a whole new world of complex social systems out there, and it's easy to get lost. Remember when you were a child probably you can learn a lot from that.
Brigette Meier is an occassional author for http://www.e-nterests.com - visit the site for more interesting articles.
rental limo Atlanta .. Lockport Chicago limo O’HareSome children practically potty train themselves, while others struggle and... Read More
Why Is Spending Time with Your Child So Important?For children... Read More
"The best blush to use is laughter: It put roses... Read More
Last week in my newsletter, I mentioned that... Read More
After giving up my profession to become a wife, a... Read More
Creating and making special memories with your child is very... Read More
Today the little red school house is not what it... Read More
So your little Susie wants to join a competitive gymnastic... Read More
Before my daughter was born my house was... Read More
When I was pregnant, we knew that we had some... Read More
One of parents' most important duties is to protect their... Read More
I am sure that this list can be jogged and... Read More
Dear Sir, It was with some interest that I read... Read More
When it's time to put your child into a daycare... Read More
We are all familiar with the stories that most students... Read More
I never dreamed that I would be in a position... Read More
MYTH: All teens have to rebel, and the teen years... Read More
Often I will hear parents say, "I just ignore Jr.... Read More
Back to school preparations are in full-swing. Soon, the first... Read More
Becoming a stepmother can undoubtedly be one of the most... Read More
You've just received a call from your child's teacher. As... Read More
Q. We just got our daughter's progress report, and it... Read More
Many parents seem to be more than a little confused... Read More
Our children are our most important legacy to the world.... Read More
Q. What's the right age to start giving a Bible... Read More
Bedford Park taxi to Midway ..I thought I was the only one in the world... Read More
What one word best sums up summer fun? Water. I... Read More
Think back to your own childhood. Chances are, some of... Read More
Did you know that cooking with your kids is a... Read More
"What age should my child start school?"This is a common... Read More
If you were to ask 100 parents why they think... Read More
Home, home on the range, Where never is heard A... Read More
Goal setting is essential for building a successful life. However,... Read More
Several similar terms describe the central attribute of a character... Read More
? Let the child choose his or her own lunch... Read More
For several years now, I've told the following story as... Read More
Many years ago, my children were raised on the various... Read More
One of the most difficult struggles in life for a... Read More
The girl's jaw dropped in horror as the police officer... Read More
Single parenting has seemingly become an acceptable norm which is... Read More
What is hard for parentsLetting them learn from their mistakes.Trying... Read More
Most people with children want to be good parents. The... Read More
There are many reasons for treating your twins as individuals... Read More
When was the last time you and your kids rolled... Read More
Reading to your child at a young age is one... Read More
Isn't the technology of today is amazing?! Between the speed... Read More
My oldest boy is fifteen and was a real jerk... Read More
Imagine a child who lacks ownership of his own life,... Read More
Oh Please, Don't Say Maybe!!!!Are you often a participant in... Read More
Impulsivity is one of the hallmarks of people with Attention... Read More
Parenting |