1. Tell me something you like about yourself? Help your child to focus on her many strengths.
2. Reinforce the positives. Give praise, recognition, a special privilege or increased responsibility for a job well done.
3. Define limits and rules clearly. A family council is an excellent place to discuss, explain and get a sense of ownership to the rules. Discuss what consequences will follow if the rules are not followed. Don't have a lot of rules, maybe four or five, but be consistent at following them.
4. Give your children responsibility to make the house a home. Everyone in the family should be responsible for some household chores daily. Responsibility makes them feel valued and part of the team.
5. Don't re-do their jobs. If you expect perfection, it is too easy for them to quit trying or else hope that you will step in and "save them" when it gets difficult.
6. Laugh at their jokes and listen attentively when they are talking to you. Being fully present when you are with your child is the only quality time there is.
7. If they don't fit in, teach them basic social skills. There are a number of behaviors that can be learned to help the "left out" child to fit into the group more easily.
8. Show them that what they do is important to you. Talk to them about activities and interests. Help them to find a hobby or interest that they excel at. Go to their games, presentations and activities.
9. Help them to set goals. Teach them to break each long-range goal into manageable bites. It is important to succeed at something ever day. Acknowledge your own successes so they can be more aware of progress they are making.
10. Don't punish them for telling the truth. Discuss problems without placing blame or attacking the child's character. Worry less about "who did this?" and more about "Let's get this mess cleaned up." If a child knows he has made a bad choice but doesn't feel attacked, he will feel more secure in trying to find solutions.
11. Create opportunities to give service and to develop tolerance for others with different values and backgrounds. These experiences can help a child to see himself in reference to the rest of the world and to be more understanding of the needs of others.
12. Give them opportunities to make decisions. Help them to see that each decision has pros and cons and may have consequences for themselves and others. If they want to do something that is clearly harmful, explain why you cannot allow them to act on it.
13. Teach them to deal with money and time wisely. When children are organized and responsible for their homework and allowance, it breeds self-assurance and personal responsibility.
14. Be a good role model. Let your children know that you feel good about yourself, but also teach them by example that mistakes aren't final but learning experiences.
15. Start and end each day on a positive and loving note. Give lots of hugs, kisses and high fives. Let them know on a consistent basis that your love is unconditional and that you are proud of them as a member of the family. You may occasionally be disappointed in their actions or choices, but will always be available for support.
? Judy H. Wright, Author, Speaker and Life Educator www.artichokepress.com
This article was written by Judy Wright, parent educator and author. Feel free to use it in your newsletter or publication, but please give full credit to the author and mention the contact information of JudyWright@ArtichokePress.com, 406-549-9813.
You will find a full listing of books, tapes, newsletters and workshops available on finding the heart of the story in the journey of life by going to www.artichokepress.com
custom home cleaning Wilmette ..Why Is Spending Time with Your Child So Important?For children... Read More
Until about the age of six, children do not generally... Read More
? Let the child choose his or her own lunch... Read More
When we talk about attention, we are talking about two... Read More
If there are any parents reading this who are thinking... Read More
Baby names are as diverse as the people to whom... Read More
I thought I was the only one in the world... Read More
You've just received a call from your child's teacher. As... Read More
Maintain CommunicationEven though teens need to separate from their parents... Read More
This year alone, 1,600 teenagers aged 15 to 19 will... Read More
Ask any teacher or adolescent counselor what the most disturbing... Read More
One of the questions I ask in parenting presentations is... Read More
As part of the whole-language (or "balanced") reading-instruction philosophy, many... Read More
Many families today are blending members from past relationships. It... Read More
Early childhood educators have called play "children's work". Many parents... Read More
It's hard to explain to the uninitiated the changes that... Read More
1. They are leaders as well as parents. They don't... Read More
I really like all natural remedy for Attention Deficit Disorder... Read More
Although many parents become frustrated as they try to maintain... Read More
Is it possible to be using our children addictively?Anything that... Read More
Let's face it.The job market is getting tougher every day.Computerization... Read More
Nurture and TeachThe single most important thing caregivers can do... Read More
Past experience with federal education programs predicts that the No... Read More
Our back-to-school buying habits do not help kids succeed in... Read More
An address given by Rev. David B. Smith... Read More
same day cleaning service Morton Grove ..As part of the whole-language (or "balanced") reading-instruction philosophy, many... Read More
Does music need to be "dumbed-down" for kids? The answer... Read More
I am a dad. I have been now for over... Read More
There isn't a school day that goes by that I... Read More
Whenever parents discuss how to deal with bed wetting, the... Read More
It's among the top criticism wives have of their husbands:... Read More
We all wish that our children should not smoke or... Read More
One of the implications of the current trend toward smaller... Read More
If your child is to derive the benefits of physical... Read More
Checking accounts are an absolute necessity these days. You can... Read More
Q. I don't like my children spending so much time... Read More
Here are fourteen spontaneous time-outs, specially designed to help you... Read More
Are you feeling overwhelmed being a parent? Do you want... Read More
"No thank you. Don't bother to send me the report... Read More
Vinegar or honey, what do kids really want? "Toys, candy,... Read More
Are your children truthful, kind, and helpful? If so, read... Read More
One reason public schools get away with educational failure, year... Read More
A tall, weary-looking mother with glasses, walked into my counseling... Read More
The older my daughter gets the more it's sinking in... Read More
As a parent you will be asked to assist with... Read More
As parents, we want our children and teens to grow... Read More
Much has been said about the "gifted child" but in... Read More
Many parenting books advise against eating out with young children.... Read More
For many years underparenting was perhaps the biggest problem facing... Read More
Information is gold when you are adopted. Every tiny piece... Read More
Parenting |